i'm me.

demoralized

2009-10-30T13:40:00.002+08:00

am i different?

i wonder why so many business pple are so eager to get into banks. true enough, the pay is totally awesome, but the job sucks, doesn't it? i have no idea how anyone can get genuinely interested in selling and buying bonds for people, calculating endless figures, and having an extremely formal environment where emails become mediums of passing on responsibilities to people.

i hate the "welcome to the real world" part. so is childhood not real? why do innocent kids who are so willing to share things with each other grow up to become the realistic adults who don't care much about others, except for maybe themselves and really close ones. i would think that the real world is darn fake. because in the real world, you get colleagues and project mates, not friends. it PAINS people to draft a nice email to each other. there's a distinct line between being formal and polite to each other, as compared to being cold to others.

and the more i do my business degree, the more i wonder why i bother about GPA. about getting good grades and proving my capability to others. especially when i realize along the way that i don't like being an employee. so where do i move on from here? do i even need wonderful GPAs to be a boss? i think good GPAs is seriously just for getting wonderful jobs. which i probably need in case my ventures fail. harhar. but if they really fail, why would i give up? especially with the experience gained along the way.

but truth is, we need $ to survive. and age is catching up. there has to be a source of income. only issue now is where should i get it. argh.

yooohooo~

2009-01-19T05:48:00.002+08:00

*sweeps away the dust*

to satisfy cheryl's desires i shall blog today! hohoho! :D

let's see....

i'm now currently in germany doing exchange with EBS. i'm having fun here most of the time because i have nothing to do, which is a completely different life as compared to the crazy hectic life i have in singapore. but i'm loving it here and in singapore :)

i wish there are more prawns and seafood because they are expensive here, and i miss them so much! (T__T) and i wish for more veggie because i can't survive on salad everyday! and i miss the people in singapore. booos!

but i love germany for its peace. and i love the people i meet here as well coz the exchange people are so so so so so nice =) and hmmm, i miss TV!! because everything here is in german and i can't understand. not even spongebob squarepants. they even went to translate the opening song so i can't sing along with it anymore. sighhhhh

and i went to a party yesterday, which felt more like a club. coz everyone was dancing and drinking and some were smooching. hmmms. guess one thing hasn't changed. parties are not for me. amongst so many people, i felt lonely again. everything it happens, whenever i attend something of this sort. nx time i just shldn't go. tsk tsk. but it's fun on the other hand, to experience such events. so i guess i'm contradicting myself =

anyway it's time to sleep soon =) so i'll end my fu yan entry of the day. i promise the next one will be better. it's the effects of having not enough sleep after a party. =S

nostalgia

2008-11-14T17:54:00.002+08:00

trying to sort thru' my notes so that i can start with mugging for exams. booos. looking at the notes, i felt quite sad. time's passing so fast. maybe it's really like wad my FIIM prof said, after 21, time start flying and u'll suddenly find yourself 40 plus. tt's a pretty scary thought.

maybe precisely it's so scary, none of us wants to think abt it. but the more you don't want to think abt it, the more likely u are going to miss out on the important stages of your life, and significant people and valuable opportunities. before long, your younger brothers and sisters seem to have suddenly became teenagers. and then you start wondering: where was i when they were young? or perhaps it's your folks. you always seem to remember them as the nice folks of about 30+. and then 40+. and then all of a suddenly they become old enough to think about retirement and where they are going to need old spectacles. sounds far away?

with respect to yourself...at this point in time, you have no choice but start thinking (or even deciding) what you want to be in the future. because the "future" is only abt 1 or 2 years away. when we are young, we often take our time to do things, here and there we dream about what we want to be in the future, what we will be like at 18, what we will be like at 21. probably how we going to get married to some prince and stuff. but when one is really of marriageable age... won't you feel a sense of fear (and of course excitement) of a new type of life? where many peeled off the last bits of what's left from their childhood and step into adulthood. funny how we always take adults's words seriously and yet we dun exactly mean everything we say to kids. growing up is more than being physically bigger. pple say it's more of "maturing", about understanding better what's the right thing to do. i would think its is nothing more than fitting into others' expectations. u mature when you start thinking into the box, conforming to the social norms and being "normal". that's growing up.

that's why i like my profs this term. they are not just the normal nice pple kind of prof. they shared a lot regarding life as well. about finding jobs and getting married and looking at the world and being yourself. haha i wanna be like them. so wad if you get into some bank and earn big bucks? where's the life man. earning loads of money while we are young and then enjoy while we are old? harhar. really. when do you earn "enough"? or rather... what things can you enjoy if u only start going ard the world after retirement. i guess i like a slow paced life where i go overseas once a year and look at the world, play the stuff i want to play. while i still physically can make it to scream on some rollarcoaster ride, climb some hills and meet new pple. but i like a fast paced job that can challenge me to finish difficult stuff within a tight schedule. tsk tsk. somehow i must find one wonderfully perfect job that can give me both. muahaha.

i should have played more when i was a kid. i should haf made more mistakes when i still could. life would be more fun. but it's okay. it's not too late to start enjoying life now. hahas.

Life and How to Survive it

2008-10-06T18:20:00.002+08:00

Okay all I noe is that this speech is by some famous litigator in Singapore, who made a lot of sense. And it's really meaningful. But doubt many can afford the time to read it. Apparently i must be feeling too free -_- oh wells, but it is enlightening to some extent :)

---------------

I must say thank you to the faculty and staff of the Wee Kim Wee School of Communication and Information for inviting me to give your convocation address. It’s a wonderful honour and a privilege for me to speak here for ten minutes without fear of contradiction, defamation or retaliation. I say this as a Singaporean and more so as a husband.

My wife is a wonderful person and perfect in every way except one. She is the editor of a magazine. She corrects people for a living. She has honed her expert skills over a quarter of a century, mostly by practising at home during conversations between her and me.
On the other hand, I am a litigator. Essentially, I spend my day telling people how wrong they are. I make my living being disagreeable.

Nevertheless, there is perfect harmony in our matrimonial home. That is because when an editor and a litigator have an argument, the one who triumphs is always the wife.
And so I want to start by giving one piece of advice to the men: when you’ve already won her heart, you don’t need to win every argument.

Marriage is considered one milestone of life. Some of you may already be married. Some of you may never be married. Some of you will be married. Some of you will enjoy the experience so much, you will be married many, many times. Good for you.

The next big milestone in your life is today: your graduation. The end of education. You’re done learning.

You’ve probably been told the big lie that ‘Learning is a lifelong process’ and that therefore you will continue studying and taking masters’ degrees and doctorates and professorships and so on. You know the sort of people who tell you that? Teachers. Don’t you think there is some measure of conflict of interest? They are in the business of learning, after all. Where would they be without you? They need you to be repeat customers.

The good news is that they’re wrong.

The bad news is that you don’t need further education because your entire life is over. It is gone. That may come as a shock to some of you. You’re in your teens or early twenties. People may tell you that you will live to be 70, 80, 90 years old. That is your life expectancy.
I love that term: life expectancy. We all understand the term to mean the average life span of a group of people. But I’m here to talk about a bigger idea, which is what you expect from your life.

You may be very happy to know that Singapore is currently ranked as the country with the third highest life expectancy. We are behind Andorra and Japan, and tied with San Marino. It seems quite clear why people in those countries, and ours, live so long. We share one thing in common: our football teams are all hopeless. There’s very little danger of any of our citizens having their pulses raised by watching us play in the World Cup. Spectators are more likely to be lulled into a gentle and restful nap.

Singaporeans have a life expectancy of 81.8 years. Singapore men live to an average of 79.21 years, while Singapore women live more than five years longer, probably to take into account the additional time they need to spend in the bathroom.

So here you are, in your twenties, thinking that you’ll have another 40 years to go. Four decades in which to live long and prosper.

Bad news. Read the papers. There are people dropping dead when they’re 50, 40, 30 years old. Or quite possibly just after finishing their convocation. They would be very disappointed that they didn’t meet their life expectancy.

I’m here to tell you this. Forget about your life expectancy.

After all, it’s calculated based on an average. And you never, ever want to expect being average.
Revisit those expectations. You might be looking forward to working, falling in love, marrying, raising a family. You are told that, as graduates, you should expect to find a job paying so much, where your hours are so much, where your responsibilities are so much.

That is what is expected of you. And if you live up to it, it will be an awful waste.
If you expect that, you will be limiting yourself. You will be living your life according to boundaries set by average people. I have nothing against average people. But no one should aspire to be them. And you don’t need years of education by the best minds in Singapore to prepare you to be average.

What you should prepare for is mess. Life’s a mess. You are not entitled to expect anything from it. Life is not fair. Everything does not balance out in the end. Life happens, and you have no control over it. Good and bad things happen to you day by day, hour by hour, moment by moment. Your degree is a poor armour against fate.

Don’t expect anything. Erase all life expectancies. Just live. Your life is over as of today. At this point in time, you have grown as tall as you will ever be, you are physically the fittest you will ever be in your entire life and you are probably looking the best that you will ever look. This is as good as it gets. It is all downhill from here. Or up. No one knows.

What does this mean for you? It is good that your life is over.

Since your life is over, you are free. Let me tell you the many wonderful things that you can do when you are free.

The most important is this: do not work.

Work is anything that you are compelled to do. By its very nature, it is undesirable.

Work kills. The Japanese have a term ‘Karoshi’, which means death from overwork. That’s the most dramatic form of how work can kill. But it can also kill you in more subtle ways. If you work, then day by day, bit by bit, your soul is chipped away, disintegrating until there’s nothing left. A rock has been ground into sand and dust.

There’s a common misconception that work is necessary. You will meet people working at miserable jobs. They tell you they are ‘making a living’. No, they’re not. They’re dying, frittering away their fast-extinguishing lives doing things which are, at best, meaningless and, at worst, harmful.

People will tell you that work ennobles you, that work lends you a certain dignity. Work makes you free. The slogan ‘Arbeit macht frei’ was placed at the entrances to a number of Nazi concentration camps. Utter nonsense.

Do not waste the vast majority of your life doing something you hate so that you can spend the small remainder sliver of your life in modest comfort. You may never reach that end anyway.
Resist the temptation to get a job. Instead, play. Find something you enjoy doing. Do it. Over and over again. You will become good at it for two reasons: you like it, and you do it often. Soon, that will have value in itself.

I like arguing, and I love language. So, I became a litigator. I enjoy it and I would do it for free. If I didn’t do that, I would’ve been in some other type of work that still involved writing fiction – probably a sports journalist.

So what should you do? You will find your own niche. I don’t imagine you will need to look very hard. By this time in your life, you will have a very good idea of what you will want to do. In fact, I’ll go further and say the ideal situation would be that you will not be able to stop yourself pursuing your passions. By this time you should know what your obsessions are. If you enjoy showing off your knowledge and feeling superior, you might become a teacher.

Find that pursuit that will energise you, consume you, become an obsession. Each day, you must rise with a restless enthusiasm. If you don’t, you are working.

Most of you will end up in activities which involve communication. To those of you I have a second message: be wary of the truth. I’m not asking you to speak it, or write it, for there are times when it is dangerous or impossible to do those things. The truth has a great capacity to offend and injure, and you will find that the closer you are to someone, the more care you must take to disguise or even conceal the truth. Often, there is great virtue in being evasive, or equivocating. There is also great skill. Any child can blurt out the truth, without thought to the consequences. It takes great maturity to appreciate the value of silence.

In order to be wary of the truth, you must first know it. That requires great frankness to yourself. Never fool the person in the mirror.

I have told you that your life is over, that you should not work, and that you should avoid telling the truth. I now say this to you: be hated.

It’s not as easy as it sounds. Do you know anyone who hates you? Yet every great figure who has contributed to the human race has been hated, not just by one person, but often by a great many. That hatred is so strong it has caused those great figures to be shunned, abused, murdered and in one famous instance, nailed to a cross.

One does not have to be evil to be hated. In fact, it’s often the case that one is hated precisely because one is trying to do right by one’s own convictions. It is far too easy to be liked, one merely has to be accommodating and hold no strong convictions. Then one will gravitate towards the centre and settle into the average. That cannot be your role. There are a great many bad people in the world, and if you are not offending them, you must be bad yourself. Popularity is a sure sign that you are doing something wrong.

The other side of the coin is this: fall in love.

I didn’t say ‘be loved’. That requires too much compromise. If one changes one’s looks, personality and values, one can be loved by anyone.

Rather, I exhort you to love another human being. It may seem odd for me to tell you this. You may expect it to happen naturally, without deliberation. That is false. Modern society is anti-love. We’ve taken a microscope to everyone to bring out their flaws and shortcomings. It far easier to find a reason not to love someone, than otherwise. Rejection requires only one reason. Love requires complete acceptance. It is hard work – the only kind of work that I find palatable.
Loving someone has great benefits. There is admiration, learning, attraction and something which, for the want of a better word, we call happiness. In loving someone, we become inspired to better ourselves in every way. We learn the truth worthlessness of material things. We celebrate being human. Loving is good for the soul.

Loving someone is therefore very important, and it is also important to choose the right person. Despite popular culture, love doesn’t happen by chance, at first sight, across a crowded dance floor. It grows slowly, sinking roots first before branching and blossoming. It is not a silly weed, but a mighty tree that weathers every storm.

You will find, that when you have someone to love, that the face is less important than the brain, and the body is less important than the heart.

You will also find that it is no great tragedy if your love is not reciprocated. You are not doing it to be loved back. Its value is to inspire you.

Finally, you will find that there is no half-measure when it comes to loving someone. You either don’t, or you do with every cell in your body, completely and utterly, without reservation or apology. It consumes you, and you are reborn, all the better for it.

Don’t work. Avoid telling the truth. Be hated. Love someone.

You’re going to have a busy life. Thank goodness there’s no life expectancy.

moments of peace

2008-06-30T23:13:00.004+08:00

silence could be a gift in a moment of overlapping voices and mixed up thoughts.

look between the loopholes of unhappiness and one will find happiness.

Stand further away to have a clearer view.

wish for less to gain more.

life's not so hard to get by after all.

overcrowded.

2008-06-29T23:37:00.002+08:00

i haf to survive thru!

she's coming soon. haf to figure out a lot of things. like how to live with one more person in my house. looking forward to it more than anything. but still, it's family affairs to sort out. and i really really hope this time she can make it, and stay here as she had wanted to. but i also hope that she did not make a wrong choice, and i hope it''ll be her influencing us more than we influence her.

he came back. family issues again. new problems will surface, definitely, but i wish this time it can be settled more easily. 20 years of problems, issues... i hope it ends on a happy note. but somehow, knowing them, it's going to be rather difficult.

it's going to be over soon. or so i console myself. but it's not going to be over yet. a couple more weeks. confused about the path that i should take. been considering my options, and hoping to find one that is correct. but how do you know whether it's correct if you never try? hrmph

that day is going to come soon. and i still haven't done much about it. not a very good status, because i don't want to upset people. but still, i'm not exactly motivated.

i hope my gastric is not back, but it feels like it. the familiar feelings of numbness, the familiar short pangs of pain, the familiar mixed up thoughts. i dunno, i wish that it'll be better, but i need time to recuperate.

on a happier note, i'm thankful for the people who keep me sane, who give me life, and who let me be myself.

Not for the weak-hearted

2008-06-25T18:32:00.000+08:00

Pledge to go fur-free at PETA.org.

你是我的眼

2008-06-22T22:40:00.002+08:00

a song that was composed and sang by a blind man in taiwan, and is now resung by 林宥嘉. a rather meaningful song. haha wt sang it that day during our k-ing night. this was one of those rare newer songs that we sang, since it was oldies night. hurhurhur.

如果我能看得见
就能轻易的分辨白天黑夜
就能准确的在人群中牵住你的手

如果我能看得见
就能驾车带你到处遨游
就能惊喜的从背后给你一个拥抱

如果我能看得见
生命也许完全不同
可能我想要的我喜欢的我爱的都不一样
眼前的黑不是黑你说的白是什么白
人们说的天空蓝是我记忆中那团白云背后的蓝天

我望向你的脸却只能看见一片虚无
是不是上帝在我眼前遮住了帘
忘了掀开

你是我的眼
带我领略四季的变换
你是我的眼带我穿越拥挤的人潮

你是我的眼
带我阅读浩瀚的书海
因为你是我的眼
让我看见这世界就在我眼前

that's why i prefer chinese songs. they have much more meaningful lyrics. hurhurhur at least they dun spend a single song on describing some umbrella, ella ella thingy. hur.

but anyway, plenty of things in life to be thankful for. life moves on :)

see elle arh eh arh!

2008-06-11T22:43:00.001+08:00

there's this girl who's so so so freaky horrible!

rahhhhhhh!

and suayly.....!!!!!!

i will probably only post the whole story when i finish the .....!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

rahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!

To cheer myself up (:

2008-06-05T00:58:00.005+08:00

ftb =) weird and fun days b4 sch!
ltb =) my super nice grp mates!
wallabies!! frens to tide thru the 1st yr in SMU =)
boos. i realize this is the only photo i haf with jessie (-_-)

my family in china! erm. a small part of them. haha
me and hazel acting cute. i forgot abt this photo totally (-_-'')
me and yixuan acting cute. erps. think it's at ps spotlight. hahas
biz law grp to celebrate my bday! =)
comms grp. haha with "leader"

huangcheng =) till now it's my fav hc photo
MAD =) nice photo! hahas
MPW grp + beng =)
my dear lil bro! so cute right. hahaha like his sis! :P
the same bro. this time giving a leng diao face coz he dun like to cut hair. haha

swan lake performance! =)

my fav photo! :D
one of my super rare outings with sheep wes david =)
hongkong trip =) with the biantai winnie the pooh

yay feel super cheered up now :) nice to see all the happy photos. glad tt at least i got the chance to experience the fun and joy and tears in all those events and stuff =)

my life is interesting. muahaha. shld'nt ask for too much =)

precious moments. gone.

2008-06-04T23:24:00.003+08:00

after that talk with cheryl that day, i thought i would be okay. actually i did become okay. but sigh, curosity got the better of me.

i went to look at some past entries of mine. in my previous blog, which was there during the huangcheng days and stuff liddat. and entries of some other pple during that same time. and i see my name slowly fading into history.

this is really bad.

i feel really lost.

i've moved on, with new really wonderful friends, but yet my conscience is pricking me. it's the feeling of not wanting to repeat the mistake over and over again, it's the feeling of "why me?"

oh dear. i've not changed much after all.

and the part about moving on. everybody moves on.

but must we leave something behind in order to move on?

活该

2008-06-02T10:47:00.003+08:00

转眼间，
又一年过去了。
最近突然走向回忆中...

我想我是在接受我的报应。

我看穿了

2008-05-29T23:49:00.003+08:00

i was looking thru some old friends' (or should i call them ex-friends) blog. felt a little empty, a little sad.

sigh.

i thought i'm over it. i feel as though i'm over it. so why still feel 可惜 that we are no longer friends. or maybe good friends. hmmms.

honestly i think i've moved on.

"if only i knew..."

that's the thought that's nagging on me everytime i have some contact with something that reminds me of that time. i wished i could have handled it better, so that i didn't lose those friends.

but there's still something worth learning from the experience. hmms.

i picked up my courage to leave a private note for one of those friends on her blog. purely because the recent sze chuan earthquake taught me that it's important to be decisive, and don't regret. because you never know wad's going to happen. accidents happen everyday. why not live life to the fullest?

hahas probably that explains my more bochap attitude to many things / people nowadays.

random encounters

2008-05-29T10:42:00.003+08:00

hmm this post is about some randomies that happened in the past few days:

1. one day me and beng were going home from work. and then suddenly this dun-look-very-pretty girl who was wearing a hot pink tank top started shouting at some banglas/indians (i can't really tell) as she was getting down the bus. here's wad their "conversation" is about (the f-words are screened by me as *beep*s. haha):

dun-look-very-pretty girl: WHAT THE *beep* ARE YOU LOOKING AT?! YOU WANT A SLAP?!

banglas/indians: ...

dun-look-very-pretty girl: STOP STARING YOU MOTHER*beep*ERS! YOU *beep*ING MOTHER*beep*ERS SHOULD JUST GO AND *beep* YOURSELVES!

banglas/ indians: ...

(dun-look-very-pretty girl alighted the bus)

ermmm....weird. hurhurhur. somehow i felt that no matter wad they did to her, she totally spoilt her own image by scolding so many f-words in a row. i'm amazed that she squeezed 3 f-words in one sentence in the first place. hurhurhur.

2. this one happened yesterday. me and beng this time were on our way to work. then we sat on the lower deck of the double-deck. and then there was this office lady sitting opposite us, holding a gigantic paper bag and dozing off.

guess wad happened. the bus turned into some lane, and she dropped some stuff out from her paper bag. so i helped to pick it up. but thing is, the bus was still swaying here and there. so i tried to help her, but things keep slipping out of my finger. finally, i picked up this pink colour small bag, but the contents inside dropped out. (-__-) so i felt ultra-paiseh. then thing is, the contents inside were 2 smaller pink packs, and then i suddenly realized to my horror that...

they are sanitary pads.

great right? i think i just ultra-paisehed herself as well. hurhurhur. so i tried to ignore the pink packs and pick up the other blue bag tt dropped out. and it slipped out of my fingers and landed even further. erps. (-___-)

so i tried to pick up the pink packs. and the bus keeps swaying. so the two of us were swaying to the bus and we can't seem to reach anything.

finally, another office lady that was sitting in the middle of us (at the back of the bus) helped out. and she managed to pick up every single thing damn swiftly. hahahas.

but anyway i felt really bad about the sanitary pads. (-__________-)

3. i've this weird guy in my office that's super duper responsible. but i don't know how to describe him. but well, he's quite weird. yar... hurhurhur. every morning, he'll brief the part-timers about the exact same thing. i swear, it's the exact same thing every time. about attire and stuff. but thing is, our company isn't very particular about attire. people just walk in with comfortable clothes such as t-shirts and berms (for ladies) and nobody cares. so he's like super uptight about everything. ive got loads of weird stories about him, but oh wells... hurhurhur

4. i got to know a lot of frens at the place i intern, because there's like super a lot of interns and part-timers. hahas. and some of them knows pple in smu who are my frens. like how coincidental right. hahahas. erm. okay i realize this is really random. (-.-)'''

5. i got to do events at shangri-la hotel! (: seriously it's not that great a hotel, with banquet services being really really poor. for eg, we ask for some glasses and ice, they take like 1 plus hour, and you still won't receive anything. you have to call like 4-5 times b4 your stuff comes. sigh. but some of the banquet staff are really nice (: there are some who gives us extra food from the buffet and stuff. the best one was the free buffet that costs $70-$100+++!!! hahahas but that one was courtesy of our client, and it's because their target audience chose not to eat the buffet. that one was really nice, but i was too paiseh to take photos. SIGH. hahahs. we had loads of good food, like cod fish, damn nice salads, mussels, large prawns and the usual seafood in a ICE-carved bowl, sushi, loads of different types of chocolates and cakes... you get the idea. hahahas. and damn a lot of juices and drinks to choose from. but oh wells, the mango juice was like potent. HAHAHA. it's super duper murky. guess who ordered it?

me. (-_-)

so everyone drank a bit to try it. and it tasted too saturated. hahahah.

oh the cutlery were those fine dining kind. but i threw away my finishing touch. HAHA. who cares about cutting open a freaky prawn with a knife and fork. (-_-) i just ate with chopsticks and an occasional fork and knive throughout the meal, obviously ignoring the poor salad knives and dessert spoons and even the soup spoon. HAHA.

normal dining with fine dining rawks! :D for some strange reason i felt myself gloating at those ignored forks and family. erps. ahahhas

ramblessssssss

2008-05-28T21:58:00.003+08:00

Yayy!!

Okay now that I've changed my layout (yar i know it doesn't look very different from before, other than i'm now an onion rather than a pig), I am HAPPY! :D

Hohohohohoho :)

Happiness stems from within....hmmm maybe it stems from my onion roots. erps. Hahahas

Updates:

- i am currently doing my internship at an event company. pretty nice pple (with a few horrible ones) and interesting job(at least most of the time)!

- i am looking forward to meeting wenting and hazel someday soon! erps. apparently i got this feeling that's it's not going to be so soon, oh wells~

- i hope to fly overseas to somewhere to CHILL. i hope to see the bright sun and lovely beaches and clear blue sea. woohoots!

- i hope to see leon, lewis, richmond, yixuan soon too!! okay this one a bit more soon, since it's gonna be this saturday. woots!

- i want to go shop and be a cheapo and make full use of the great singapore sale! but i haf sadly no time, and more importantly no $$$$$

- i wanna watch damn a lot of movies but they all say "coming soon". Including Ice Age 3 that also says "coming soon" but I checked online somewhere and it says that it's only opening in June 2009. Erps.

- I am gaining a lot of fatty deposits (aka lipids) in my body due to lack of exercise and eating too many meals every day. SIGH. and thanks to the whoever that says i got 33% fatty deposits, i am CONVINCED that i am fat, because according to the tables, 33% is OBESE! omg omg omg. *faints* hahas. so somehow i'll haf to lose some fats in order to be healthy. but i'm too lazyyyy to exercise. erps. (-__-)

- I wish for more time to sleep. Though it's my own fault that I can't seem to fall asleep at night, and tendency to feel sleepy in the day. Hurhurhur

- I left a msg on a person's blog whom i still care about. hmmm afterall last time were really good friends. still feel sad when i suddenly was linked to her blog and then kanna reminded of the unhappy times that followed. so yup, left a msg to ask her to be happy, since she doesn't seem to be too happy.

- I want to go kbox!!! HELLO~?!?!?! i freaky ten thousand million trillion zillion banana-ish godzillion never go k oredi! omg i freaky got no life. SIGH. yar my amount of life is measured by the number of kbox i go. ahahaha

-I want to play my pink colour DS and repair my pink colour laptop and buy the pink colour phone that cheryl has!!! booos. all my pink coloured stuff are out of sync. erps. hahahas.

ermmmm ran out of things to ramble about. that's all for the ramble of the day. hahahas

woots!

2008-05-28T17:20:00.003+08:00

i'm finally back from my hibernation. *cracks the ice ard myself*

speaking of ice, i want to marry a penguin. heard they are super loyal to their partners. and they are super sweet. and the guy is the one who takes care of the egg. HOHOHO. wad a slack life the female penguin leads. hahahs. budden again, i'm not sure whether i'll prefer fishing in the ice cold ocean while the male gets to just sit on the egg and wait for food. hrmph.

okay updates. this website is now known as http://i-am-an-onion.blogspot.com/

duh.

reason is simple.

onions have layers.

go figure. hahas

wells, i have plenty to blog about, but due to the time constraints of my job (boooos!) i shall blog again soon k! hahahas. think that will take place tmr.

(-__-''')

back to workie~

sweet & bitter

2008-02-21T23:36:00.004+08:00

this is probably my last entry for this blog, before i move on to somewhere else, and start blogging regularly again. so here's a lil sharing of what i felt the past days...

sweet...
i feel happy being with beng, leon, richmond, yixuan & lewis in school everyday. i think they keep me sane n happy n stressless during classes. i'm really thankful to meet new frens and have companions for every lesson during uni. honestly there's not much chance for me to feel lonely. so i'm really really thankful. every lunch, every dinner, is filled with laughter no matter how much work we have to do. laughter is the best medicine (:

i'm gg to watch huangcheng with wt n beng. wahahahah. with wt insisting that me n beng are the light bulbs. wahaha. but i'm looking forward to it (: shld be fun watching huangcheng again! almost forgot abt it until i saw the facebook group one random day. hahahas

term break is coming soon! i hope i can take a break and catch up with some of my thousands of words reports in the meantime! hahas. and there's the dining for FT which i think will be interesting. wahahah. i hope i'm not the one to throw some chicken bone to some poor classmate or the one to spill coffee or tea on another ill-fated classmate. hahahas

i'm super thankful for some of my profs as well. i needed 2 recommendations for my academic references for international exchange. and all the profs that i approached agreed! so i was like super touched. but i only needed the help of 2 profs, who were both super nice and promised to write a super nice one for me. so i'm really happy (:

bitter...
seriously i dun see anything wrong with being in smu. to me, there's no big deal abt which uni i chose in the end becoz it doesn't say anything abt my capabilities. simple fact: i got into all 3 business schools. and i believe i chose smu for a good enough reason. so i dun see why some pple are just being obviously brainless and badmouthing smu in front of a smu student. like duh. i din even say any bad stuff abt ntu or nus. so i dun see why pple shld do so for smu just because it's new. new doesn't mean that it's the worst. and dun bother abt those uni ranking boards. because duh (again), smu is NEW. which means that it won't have as much history as other schools, neither will it have as much research papers. i'm not discounting other schools, but i just dun see why others will try to discount smu because it's new.

i dun believe that all smu students will love smu. seriously lar, which school is so perfect? but at least the culture is very different from the other 2. and i guess we all somehow fit into the culture, or else we won't have made the choice to go to a new seminar-style school as compared to the other 2 older lecture-style schools.

sian. i dun like pple who look down on others just because they belong to another school. and i dun like it because its not them who earned the glory for the school. so wad's there to gloat? it's like as meaningless as discrimination without reason. hurhurhur

--

on a lighter note, i shall strive harder to be zai! muahaha :)

STUPID QUESTIONS WITH THE SMART ANSWERS

2008-02-15T22:54:00.002+08:00

hurhurhur a fren of mine sent me and some of her other frens this email. supposedly to relieve stress before week 7 ie. the freaky stressful midterms week:

BOY : May I hold your hand?
GIRL : No thanks, it isn't heavy.

GIRL : Say you love me! Say you love me!
BOY : You love me...

GIRL : If we become engaged will you give me a ring??
BOY : Sure, what's your phone number??

GIRL : I think the poorest people are the happiest.
BOY : Then marry me and we'll be the happiest couple

GIRL : Darling, I want to dance like this forever.
BOY : Don't you ever want to improve??

BOY : I love you and I could die for you!
GIRL : How soon??

BOY : I would go to the end of the world for you!
GIRL : Yes, but would you stay there??

MAN : You remind me of the sea.
WOMAN : Because I'm wild, romantic and exciting?
MAN : NO, because you make me sick.

WIFE : You tell a man something, it goes in one ear and comes out of the other.
HUSBAND : You tell a woman something: It goes in both ears and comes out of the mouth.

MARY : John says I'm pretty. Andy says I'm ugly.What do u think, Peter?
PETER : A bit of both. I think you're pretty ugly.

Girlfriend : '...And are you sure you love me and no one else ?'
Boyfriend : 'Dead Sure! I checked the whole list again yesterday'.

Teacher : 'Which is more important to us, the sun or the moon?'
Pupil : 'The moon'.
Teacher : 'Why?'
Pupil : 'The moon gives us light at night when we need it but the sun gives us light only in the day time when we don't need it'.

Teacher : 'What do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested?'
Pupil : 'A teacher'.

Waiter : 'Would you like your coffee black?' Customer : 'What other colors do you have?'

My father is so old that when he was in school, history was called current affairs.

Teacher : 'Sam, you talk a lot !'
Sam : 'It's a family tradition'.
Teacher : 'What do you mean?'
Sam : 'Sir, my grandpa was a street hawker, my father is a teacher'.
Teacher : 'What about your mother?'
Sam : 'She's a woman'.

Tom : 'How should I convey the news to my father that I've failed?'
David: 'You just send a telegram: Result declared, past year's performance repeated'.

Teacher : 'Now, children, if I saw a man beating a donkey and stopped him, what virtue would I be showing?'
Student : 'Brotherly love'.

Teacher : 'Now, Sam, tell me frankly do you say prayers before eating?'
Sam : 'No sir, I don't have to, my mom is a good cook'.

Patient : 'What are the chances of my recovering doctor?'
Doctor : 'One hundred percent. Medical records show that nine out of ten people die of the disease you have. Yours is the tenth case I've treated. The others all died'.

Teacher : ' Can anybody give an example of COINCIDENCE?'
One Student : 'Sir, my Mother and Father got married on the same day and at the same time.'

Teacher : ' George Washington not only chopped down his father's Cherry tree, but also admitted doing it. Now do you know why his father didn't punish him ?'
One Student: ' Because George still had the axe in his hand.'

happy belated v day~!

2008-02-15T17:09:00.003+08:00

Hahaha happy belated v day pple!! Here's a cute photo to share the ermmm joys (??!!) of v day with u pple though i'm super busy with endless projects! (:

It's from cute overload by the way (:

cute right!!! they got heart-shaped fur!! oh man next time if i ever get myself a small dog, i'll shave/ colour its fur until it get that heart-shaped effect too! muahahahah

okay this is just another brainless post. hahahas. maybe next week i'll post another one. muahaha

那年夏天

2008-01-27T22:40:00.000+08:00

长大以后现在的我常常会寂寞
偶尔缱绻星星闪烁剩最亮一颗
往事如风划过夜空你的歌
跳动音符熟悉旋律谁来合

长大以后现在的我忘记了快乐
人来人去留在身边的朋友不多
那些天真纯纯的笑哪去了
洁白翅膀美丽天使不见了

曾经以为世界很美没人流眼泪
吹熄蜡烛许个心愿全都会实现
原来的我怀念从前是因为太留恋
懵懂的岁月中只收藏了简单的笑脸

我愿相信时间倒退记忆的最美
合起双手闭上双眼再许下心愿
在某一天回到从前让他们都出现
但他们没改变让时钟停在那年的夏天
让时钟停在那年的夏天

One of those songs that my cousin sent me when i was in china, which only today then i have the time to figure out the lyrics. hahas. but the lyrics are meaningful. due to the numerous bday parties that i'm invited to for pple's 21st bday celebration, somehow makes me feel a lil sad. growing up isn't fun. coz time is flying by too fast. too many words left unspoken, too many things left undone, too many memories still unforgotten, too many friends come and go.

nah not becoming pessimistic. but just kind of caught up with the realism of life. sigh. school is not as fun as last time anymore. somehow. coz it feels as though i have less friends or something. hahas. somehow. weird right, not like i fell out with anyone or anything, but it just feels more unfamiliar. or maybe its just me withdrawing into an invisible inner circle.

SIGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.

and working weekend mornings away is both a blessing and a curse i guess. i lost a lot of free time that i could have spent on other things, but it's a good getaway from school and my normal life. seeing kids brighten up my day. i wonder why i cannot stand the thought of going for teacher training at NIE but yet i like teaching. hrmph. hahahahs

and this year i feel so over gan chiong. for dunno wad reason. argh. i wish i can relax a bit. but poor time management on my part isn't working. i just can't seem to balance 6 modules with 4 weekend lessons with kids and family and friends with international exchange application, exchange scholarship application, internship application, major selection...... SIGH. and i think i'm stepping on people's nerves. Tho i somehow appear fine in school, presentations and everything. but there's a nagging feeling that i've left something undone. that kind of feeling. how??????? :(

i suspect i'm stressed. wahaha. okay time for proper time management on my part le. Like how to make good use of my time (:

JIAYOUSSSSS to me! Hip hip hooray! *determined look*

石欣卉 & 王建复 - 想听的话(最高点片尾曲)

2008-01-10T23:26:00.000+08:00

Been watching the peak before i went china, and i really really like this song. too bad i can't find its mp3. boooos. but this song is nice. yay!! (:

慢慢把車窗搖下你在轉角處等她
難過想大方的唱用可以整天對你的牽掛

這場愛不會開花我情愫卻割捨不下
明知你愛的是他卻還是學不會擺脫這掙扎

想聽的話你說給了她我的快樂從此蒸發
如果痛是愛的代價那傷心顏色該怎麼畫

想聽的話得不到回答我卻還在獨自裝傻
雨打濕我的臉頰好讓你看不見我眼角的變化

oh anyway yar obviously i'm back from china. muahaha. i currently have 6 mods and a weekend job. -faints- kind of busy busy, but still alright i guess. yay!

just feeling kind of down lately. due to loads and loads of problems here and there. rahhhh. shoo shoo. tsk tsk. but yar hopefully i'll be back on my feet soon. but some things are hard to change. esp family. sigh.

will brush aside some more cobwebs from this blog soon. wahahah. i wonder whether it still has any readers. and my poor pig there. it's so unfed. hahahas

Exams are over (:

2007-11-30T11:30:00.001+08:00

Yayyyyy...hahaha though this blog entry is a bit late since my exams ended on wednesday, but still, got entry better than no entry right. hahahas

Updates:

1. i got a new phone again! :D Hahaha yar i sold my S500i and bought a new Samsung U700 just yesterday. it's chio! coz it's like purple~~ Wahaha. Though i think my S500i is really quite chio too but sigh, who ask the keypad to keep splitting into halves and make me go service centre so many times. tsk tsk tsk.

2. i did badly for exams!! erps. yar but i guess it was pretty bad for my usual exam standards. like i won't ever leave a 14 marks blank but hey! i did. and i won't do a 50 marks essay question so badly, but hey! i really dunno how to do it -__-''' hahahas but nvm lar it's over anyway.

3. i'll be lonely for 2 weeks! T_T boos. Coz my mom n bro are going back china to visit my dad while i sulk alone at home. hahahas. okay lar i asked for it. coz didn't want to go back china so soon. will join them in 2 weeks' time. meanwhile i'll just watch loads of korean drama vcds and paint my room and see what outings i can chap into. hahahas

4. i'm going china in 2 weeks' time!! erps i think i just mentioned that in the previous point. but still. hahahas. i'll get to see my beloved snow again!! La la la la! So I'm happily looking forward to the trip. Hohoho

5. I need to pack my room! It's now in a terrible mess, where my clothes and worksheets and food and pillows and everything else gets rojaked together on my bed. SIGH. I think i won't get to watch too many dvds after all T__T

And errr....what else should I update about? Err... I miss my friends? Booooooos. Really arh T___T damn long never saw a single soul le other than those in SMU. Booooooos. I think i gg to be loner soon -.-'''

And being loner means i got leng-er. As u can see so far. Brrr...

2007-10-25T23:09:00.000+08:00

Have you ever stared into a kaleidoscope? it's pretty, filled with different colours. You have dark colours and bright colours. And together, they form a beautiful picture to the viewer. Just like how life is. Only with ups and downs will it be interesting and form beautiful memories. It makes you treasure the happy moments and be thankful for the unhappy ones because you learn from those. Yup, I guess that's what life's about (:

happy happy entry~! (:

2007-10-21T23:32:00.000+08:00

long time no blog. wahahah! this is gg to be a long update, like, as long as i can. hahahas

okay basically it's like a whole load of pictures. coz i finally can transfer my pictures from the hp to my vaio! la la la! :D

okay so here they are~:

Berries Dinner @ Expo (this is like 10 years ago or sth. hahahas)

okay actually it's just a few months ago, but it felt like years. hehh. anyway it was a celebration dinner for the 10th year anniversary of berries, the chinese teaching centre i teach at. hahas. the food was great (and for my standard damn great) and the people were super duper nice (: that's why i like working at berries (: the teachers are super nice (: though the pay could be higher (;

there's actually much more dishes than this. but half way through i was more concerned with eating and playing games and singing songs than to take pictures. hehe. eh, the dessert was hashima can?? i was practically goo-ing over the dessert. hahas not that i nv eat before, but the food tasted really good (: and for a free company dinner like this, it's not bad already lar :p

cereal prawns (: the prawns were damn big and damn nice!! :D

steamed fish. hahahs. this tasted somehow damn good also! :D

sharkfin soup. and u can feel the sharkfin! it's not like those cheapo sharkfin soup where u get egg and skimpy sharkfin. i ate like 2 bowls of this. hahahs

roasted piglet. oh the skin was super crunchy! and the sauce was good too! i can't believe that they actually gave one whole pig to each table! hahahs.

this was the appetizer. but somehow it appeared last in the pictures. bahahaha i'm like too lazy to change the sequence so yup. hahahs. it's damn good too. there's lobster salad, calamari, seasoned jellyfish, yada yada. damn good too!

Birthday itself

this is like the most interesting birthday i've had. wahaha.

i start first with a lunch at seoul garden. or rather, we wanted to eat lunch at seoul garden. so me and beng and mama and didi went to seoul garden. to see this stupid sign that says: "we are currently holding a function. please join our waiting list."

-_-

SIAN. hahahas. so we joined the waiting list and waited for like 1 hour plus. so this 1 hour plus we just shopped around at seiyu which is now known as BHG for i-dunno-wad-weird-reason. and yayy we ate seoul garden. so end of that part of the story.

the next part is the ACTION -__- Because i wanted a PSP slim, so my mama brought us to Sim Lim Square to get this pretty psp that i want: the lavender purple PSP.

and then we walked around and around, in search for a reasonable price and a non-liar-or-cheater salesperson to buy the product from. so eventually after many hours we decided on this particular store. Mobile Hut. they just cannot make it. like seriously cannot make it. i think people should just totally boycott the shop or something. don't believe me? go google mobile hut sim lim. u'll see plenty of cheated experience from that shop.spread it to other people if u agree with me after looking at other cases and my cui experience. heh but anyway, here's what happened to the poor birthday girl:We went to many different places to search for the cheapest and safest PSP slim that we can get. The prices range from 400 to 460 dollars (inclusive of GST) for a modified PSP slim that plays downloaded game, with a pouch, a screen protector, a 4 gb memory stick PRO DUO and some games in the PSP. The package was about the same. The only important element that we missed out is that we needed a UMD to play the downloaded games.

There was this salesman at Mobile Hut. First when we enter the shop, he quoted us a rather reasonable price for the modified PSP slim at $390 inclusive of GST after discount, claiming that it's enough for a whole package. It was not the cheapest price, but it included warranty and his words were convincing, so we rather tempted to buy from him. But we did not give up searching for a cheaper alternative. So we found this shop that sells everything for $460 including free servicing, warranty and free games. It was a rather good deal, but the lady there, her attitude just turns people off. So we were not very keen on buying from her.

So we went back to Mobile Hut to try to hagger the price down but we failed. The sales guy was rather insistent on his price. So he quoted the rest of accessories prices that we needed for a functional PSP. We agreed on a PSP slim with pouch, 4 gb memory card and a screen protector. Then he said he "forgot" to mention that the version that we are paying for is not the latest one. So we had to add a $10 upgrade fee, which he say he usually charge $30. He also said that its optional for us to get the latest version, but it's redundant because according to him, if we don't upgrade, we can't play all types of games. so why would we settle for a not updated version? So we added $10 to the original $390 price. That added up to $400.

But that's not all. Then he asked us what color we wanted. We chose the lavander purple one. He said that that color was a limited edition color and and was more expensive. OMG! More cost! It was like $20 dollars more expensive. (But he said actually is $25, not sure true or false) So it became $420. So finally, we agreed on this price and mama went to draw money and he set down to modify the set. He said after modifying we could play downloaded games and up to this point in time, he did not mention a thing about the UMD being there.

When mama was away, the Mobile Hut sales person used a very useful sales tactic. He recommended us a set that included additional items such as only-psp-slim-can-use earphones for a little bit more price. And he told us not to mention it to my mom. Wow, the robert cialdini's principle of exclusivity. But I turned him down because i felt that he was just trying to con me and beng, who probably looked easy to con to him.

So we were give 3 games at first, but we added until it became 5 games. And he "accidentally" loaded the wrong game for me. i wanted GTA, but he loaded some small game called the godfather. -__- so i made him go reload it.

After he finally returned with the modified set, he then tell us that i cannot play any games at all without the UMD card. Wad the heck?! Hur -_- And the cheapest UMD cost like $30 for some retarded idiot game! Which means it will add up to $450! We were not going to pay that money man! Who knows wad else we need to pay for to make his stupid modified psp work. It's too ridiculous (and damn UNETHICAL) to keep adding money like that. He started arguing with my mama until my mama was damn pissed. She decided not to buy the psp afterall. Then the guy say that HE CANNOT RESELL THE PSP and we must pay for his modification cost.

We wanted to walk away and that guy threatened to call the police. RARH! And we couldn't be bothered with him. Guess wad he did? He tailed us all the way. We didn't even notice until after running across the traffic lights because the stupid traffic light says we only have 10 seconds left. And he called us and accused us of having a guilty conscience and running away when we were JUST TRYING TO CROSS THE STUPID ROAD! Hur -_-" He stopped us from walking any further and told us to pay for his time or wait for the police to come. We waited 25 minutes for the police. By then, it's about 8 plus pm already.

The police eventually came and they let us off. the police officer was damn nice, and he was sympathetic towards the fact that I am standing there in the middle of the road on my birthday to wait for the police for losing interest in buying my birthday present anymore. Wad the heck.

So the guy still tried to reason with the police to make us pay. haha even the police said he sounded funny. hahas. and after that my mom was saying that luckily we didn't follow him back to the shop to wait for the police. coz everybody else, whom we assume to be accomplices will try to bully us and make us pay. heh.

so my mom got so pissed with the whole incident that she refuse to buy a psp for me anymore. SIGH. all that stupid Mobile Hut's fault. And i'm pretty sure I almost got conned, because there are so many forums about this particular shop conning other people, such as removing the battery from the standard pack, stuff liddat. hehh. and my mom, because of this mind-tormenting incident, FORGOT TO BUY ME A BDAY CAKE. sigh. in the end we went to ang mo kio to buy small cakes from breadtalk. and i have no candle. boohoo. but my bro was really sweet. he still gave me some of his candles from last time, and hold there and pretend to let me blow, then he let them fall. to signify i've blown them. sweet bro i have. so here's the pictures! (:

my tiny pretty bday cakes (:

my mama and didi and me ^__^

this is the precious moments october princess figurine i got from beng (:

then this is the precious moments jewelry box (: inside is a pair of earrings that came along with it too (:

it has a lock too! (:

pretty flowers (:

with an orange ribbon! (: but the whole thing took 1/2 hour to take out -__- next time just get a STALK can? -__-

MISC Updates

Bahaha these are meaningless pictures. really. hahahas okay first one i digged out is a plankton! tada! it's downloaded when i was irritated with the planktons that keep speaking as thought the whole class only got them. wahahas

the next one is some random pic that i took when i was mugging alone in some ulu gsr. so poor thing right. that day nobody free to pei me mug. HAI. so poor thing~~~~

then the next piece of news is that i got into local exchange @ NUS to study german. Yayy. Hur. supposed to be something happy budden so sians. coz nobody else got in can??? T_T at least people i know. then they are automatically placed onto the waiting list. meaning that if i reject my application then maybe they'll get it. wad the. booos. cui lar. i just want to go to my pretty pretty germany lor. so cheemy for wad neh? T__T

my birthday celebration (:

2007-10-17T10:28:00.000+08:00

hohohoho went to celebrate my bday with my darlings~~~ (ewww...)

okay basically went kbox (finally!!) on monday to celebrate my bday with cheryl n yx. hahahs. they were so sweet can? (tho i sweeter) but yar!! they made me cushions!! damn cute! i show u i show u!!!

this are the 3 cushions they HAND-sewed for me! :D

this is the donut (cake) they bought for me! hahas but yx ate it in the end. i ate a sugar donut (:

an ugly photo of me -__-''' cheryl got cui photography skills :p

the 3 of us! (: damn long nv see them already! T_T

Met up with wenting too!! hahahah that was last friday :D we went vivo and ate mussel guys! wahaha :p but dun eat mussel guys unless u got plenty of etiquette or v small appetite or loads of $ k? we ate there because there was set meals! normally restaurants dun haf set meals for dinner, but yup that day mussel guys had set meals. so we ordered that, thinking tt the price is pretty reasonable. BUT THE PORTION WAS SO SMALL! T_T reminds me of those high class french restaurants. hahas. so after the meal we felt so hungry. still. hahahas. don't get me wrong, the service is damn good there. all the staff are super polite. but they take pretty long to serve each item, hahahas made me feel like those not-so-high-class-people who have plenty of patience. hahas

shld haf taken photos hor? T_T hahahas. oh yar! i bought wenting a damn chio (okay i thot it was damn chio) BLING BLING pencil case. wahahaha. in the end she say she going to use the underside which is plain and only say the words "Girls" -__- hahahahas.

pretty busy these days. booos. will blog as much as possible hor. hahahas

planktons

2007-09-26T10:03:00.000+08:00

some people are just plain irritating. like seriously irritating. keeps talking in class as though the whole class only got her and the prof. RAHHHHH!!!!!

i wish there's a fire extinguisher or something in my class now then i can just shoot the carbon wadever-xide at her.

it's just like so suay can??? She's in both my MS class and my CAT class. SIAN. never detest a person so much before even getting down to know her. hur. perhaps she's a damn nice person outside class or sth. hahas if i know then nx time she can evolve and upgrade into a spongebob squarepants or patrick the starfish or sth. but for the time being she'll remain deemed a plankton -.-

RAHHHHH!!

Good memories for the 70s & 80s Babies (:

2007-09-20T09:08:00.000+08:00

Hahas Cheryl forwarded me this email which i found quite nice (: Coz it really reminds me of loads of childhood stuff that I've already forgotten. Muahaha seeing that my 20 years old is approaching soon (boos). It just kind of reminds me how old I already am, but it's still fond memories nevertheless.

> 1. You grew up watching He-man, MASK, Transformers, Silver Hawk and Mickey Mouse. Not to forget Ninja Turtles, My Little Pony and Smurfs too..

> 2. You grew up brushing your teeth with a mug in Primary school during recess time. You will squat by a drain with all your classmates beside you, and brush your teeth with a coloured mug.The teachers said you must brush each side 10 times too.

> 3. You know what SBC stands for.

> 4. You pay 40 cents for Chocolate or Strawberry MILK every week in class.

> 5. You watch a very popular Malay dubbed Japanese drama on RTM1 about schoolgirls who possess powerful skills in volleyball called Meoro Attack.

> 6. You find your friends with pagers and handphone cool in Secondary school.

> 7. SBS buses used to be non-airconditioned. The bus seats are made of wood and the cushion is red. The big red bell gives a loud BEEP! when pressed.. There are colourful tickets forTIBS buses. The conductor will check for> tickets by using a machine which punches a hole in the ticket.

> 8. Envelopes given to us to donate to Sharity Elephant every Children's Day.

> 9. You've probably read Young Generation magazine.You know who's Vinny the little vampire and Acai the constable.

> 10. You were there when they first introduced MRT here. You went for the first ride with your parents and you would kneel on the seat to see the scenery.

> 11. Movie tickets used to cost only $3.50.

> 12. Gals are fascinated by Strawberry Short Cake and Barbie Dolls.

> 13. You learn to laugh like The Count in Sesame Street .

> 14. You longed to buy tidbits called Kaka (20 cents per pack), and Ding Dang (50 cents per box), that had a toy in it and it changes every week. Not forgetting the 15 cents animal crackers and the ring pop, where the lollipop is the diamond on the ring.

> 15. You watched TV2 (also known as Channel 10) cartoons because Channel 5 never had enough cartoons for you.

> 16. Hardy Boys, Nancy Drew, The Three Investigators, Famous Five and Secret Seven are probably the thickest story books you ever thought you have read. Even Sweet Valley High and Malory Towers .

> 17. KFC used to be a high class restaurant that serve food in plates and let you use metal forks and knives.

> 18. The most vulgar thing you said was asshole and idiot and THE MOST EXTREME WAS 'super white'... you just couldn't bring yourself to say the hokkien relative.

> 19. Catching was the IN thing and "twist" as the magic word.

> 20. Your English workbooks was made of some damn poor quality paper that was smooth and yellow.

> 21. CDIS were your bestfriend.

> 22. The only computer lessons in school involved funny pixellised characters in 16 colours walking about trying to teach you maths.

> 23. Waterbottles were slinged around your neck and a must everywhere you go.

> 24. Boys loved to play soccer with small plastic balls in the basketball court.

> 25. Teng-teng, five stones, chapteh, hentam bola and zero point were all the rage with the girls and boys too...

> 26. Science was fun with the balsam and the angsana being the most important plants of our lives, guppies and swordtail being the most important fish.

> 27. Who can forget Ahmad, Bala, Sumei and John, eternalized in our minds from the textbooks. Even Mr Wally & Mr. Yakki. What abt Miss Lala??? And Zaki and Tini in Malay Textbooks?

> 28. We carry out experiments of our own to get ourself badges for being a Young Zoologist/Botanist etc.

> 29. Every Children's day and National day you either get pins or pens with 'Happy Children's Day 1993' or dumb files with 'Happy National Day 1994'.

> 30. In Primary six you had to play buddy for the younger kids like big sister and brother.

> 31. We wear BM2000, BATA, or Pallas shoes.

> 32. Your form teacher taught you Maths, Science and English.

> 33. The worksheets were made of brown rough paper of poor quality.

> 34. You went to school in slippers and a raincoat when it rained, and you find a dry spot in the school to sit down, dry your feet, and wear your dry and warm socks and shoes.

> 35. School dismissal time was normally around 1 pm.

> 36. There would be spelling tests and mental sums to do almost everyday.

> 37. Your friends considered you lucky and rich if your parents gave you $3 or more for pocket money everyday.

> 38. You see Wee Kim Wee's face in the school hall.

> 39. You freak out when the teacher tells you to line up according to height and hold hands with the corresponding boy or girl.

> 40. Boys like to catch fighting spiders.

> 41. Collecting and battling erasers was a pastime for boys.

> 42. Autograph books were loaded with "Best Wishes", "Forget Me Not", and small poems like "Bird fly high, hard catch.Friend like you, hard to forget".

> 43. Class monitors and prefects loved to say "You talk somemore, I write your name ah!"

> 44. There were at least 40 people in one class.

> 45. Large, colourful schoolbags were carried.

> 50. You brought every single book to school, even though there was one thing called the timetable.

Spread this heart warming message around, you don't get something like this very often. ;)

--

Yup so I'm sharing with you people! :D

Weekends (:

2007-09-17T09:00:00.000+08:00

Watched Swan Lake on Ice on Saturday, the afternoon show. Supposedly I had filming but last minute it was cancelled. Phew. Hahas zhihao sold me the tix at a lower price coz the person that he's supposed to watch with cannot make it at the last minute. So i watched it with beng instead. Hahas

The performance was really really pretty. Everyone's movements were so graceful and seemingly perfect (to a know-nothing-about-ice-skating person like me). Hahas. You can go watch the trailer here:

http://www.imperialicestars.com/productions/sloi/movies.shtm

But me and beng couldn't really appreciate it totally. coz throughout the entire thing THERE WERE NO WORDS SPOKEN! -_-''' Hur. I din expect it to be wordless. Hurhurhur. And we didn't know the original story of Swan Lake. So ended up we felt kind of bored when the classical music went on playing and they kept skating but we didn't know wad's happening. Hahas

But now that we found out the story online, then everything started to make sense (: Hahahs.

Oh here's some photos that I koped from the Swan Lake website:

(my seats were too far to take such decent photos. ahahaha)

Some of the effects were really pretty cool (: Hahas. But I have to admit I enjoyed Phantom of the Opera much much more :p

Sunday was spent going Berries for work and then joining my mom and bro for porridge steamboat at Bugis. It tasted really not too bad, though we 3 pple cannot finish the huge pot of porridge coz we all didn't have much appetite. Hahas. Shouldn't have eaten lunch. Hahas. But it was quite an interesting experience to eat there. Hahas and they have a lot of seasoning that only China has. So the taste was very familiar and that felt nice (:

After that wanted to join yx and cheryl (i damn damn long nv see them liaos) for kbox but my mom dun allow. Hahhas. think she scared i really get fever like wad my doc says. Hahas. Oh wells. So ended up going home for mugging T_T

But ended up watching tv all the way till 1 plus am. That's just great. Hur.

Kind of stressed lately though. Not feeling too well. Sigh. Got too much to do, and got lots of time to do them. BUT there's no motivation. Cui

某某人

2007-09-07T08:49:00.001+08:00

saw this on jessie's blog. it's the lyrics of the first song to a musical play. hahas. just find it very nice so posted it here (:

某某人他住在很那个的小镇
很那个的镇上住着很多人
很多人总喜欢很那个地问
某某人是不是什么人的什么人

某某人他也像任何人
有很多的烦恼很那个的责任
来不及去想也不习惯去问
做一个没人特别提起的某某人

其实某某人他并不介意任何人
可是任何人总有恩怨来分
有些人的朋友难免总是有些人的敌人
所以某某人总须要得罪某某人

某某人有他的快乐和愚蠢
当每个人随便他不会太认真
他有足够的聪明慢慢学会什么叫做安份
该不懂的时候不会很那个地问

某某人重覆着很多人的故事
白天他演现实晚上看电视
青春是幻梦理想是很那个的空
教堂在敲着婚礼和丧礼的钟

其实某某人他并不介意任何人
可是任何人总有恩怨来分
有些人的朋友难免总是有些人的敌人
所以某某人总须要得罪某某人

某某人他住在很那个的小镇
当他死的时候来了很多人
很多人在哀悼然后很那个地问
那个某某人是不是什么人的什么人

interesting neh. the meaning of the lyrics. hahas. nah, let you all see. then maybe think a bit :p

peeks into my new furniture! (:

2007-08-18T12:25:00.000+08:00

la la la i got some pictures of my new inhabitants of my pig sty. wahahas. and i'm still in the process of cleaning up my pig sty to make it fit for living for a human. hahas. will take some pics when i'm done coz im so proud of it. wahahas

okay these are my new inhabitants:

a me to you bear (: a 4 piece mirror from ikea (this is in my living room)
my PINK chair! wahaha it's bimbo pink :D
my new rug in the pig sty! hahas it's the one with pink colour on it. hahahs

then this is my new TV & DVD table. looks a bit small though. hahahs

and this is my new fan. hahahas. cute right! don't look like fan. hahahas. but the good thing is tt it doesn't take up too much space (:

got other furnitures in the house that's new too. hahahas but too lazy to take a photo of each of them. it's nice to get new furniture. hahas. makes the room brighten up much more, coz it's now filled with colours! pink, baby blue, milky white, wood brown and of coz orange! (:

updates (:

2007-08-14T20:49:00.000+08:00

okay long time no blog decently!! (:

hahahs so time for me to update pple about my life abit. at least wad i've been thru the summer break. hahas. okay let's see...

i guess i have to start with dominoes of dreams. HAI. wad started off as a very interesting project turned out to be pretty disappointing, to be honest. i dunno how to explain. at first it seems to have a good start. in fact it did have a good start. and then in the middle, the direction seems to have lost focus. the issue with mandy affected me quite a lot. because it's afterall the charity project, but charity should not be done at the stake of making others who are already giving their all to help to make losses. despite all the publicity crap. honestly, publicity is really not as much as it seems to be. the outreach is not as much as it seems to be. it just sounds much better than it really is. but the sad thing is, i really believed that there's a lot of potential to the project. but the whole management kind of ruined what could have been a really successful project. still, the whole committee worked harmoniously, so i guess that's one of the good things to this project. but it sucked away a lot of my holidays. even till now there's still stuff to it. had joined it because i wanted to help richard. hurrr. in the end i think i didn't help him to my greatest extent so i feel bad towards him. but there are a lot of things tt i can't agree with. so yup, let's just take it as a good learning experience i guess. hurr. i'm really not gonig to continue with it after school reopens. i guess i won't have the passion to give much anymore by that time.

and i missed my uni-y camp because of that. HAI. i feel sad ): leon somemore was telling me that it's v fun lor. boos. T_T maybe i can hun4 next year or sth bah. hehh.

and i was helping my cousin with her SAT preparations. it's really getting harder to get into SMU, and i really hope she can come, so that her dreams can be fulfilled (: but it's tiring on me also, having to mark her essays, and help her to find out more information, help her to book the test.. stuff liddat.

and things aren't great at home i guess, with my mom getting upset every 2 days kind of thing. HAI.

and there's other things going on too. bleahs. things like me realising that one of my friends is actually v interested in looking at females. HURRR. things like me buying loads of new furniture for my pig sty (:

will post pics of my new furnitures soon wor! (:

people always leave.

2007-08-09T21:55:00.000+08:00

that's the nick of one of the people on my msn list. hahas one whom i probably talked maybe once or twice in my entire life.

i kind of agree. hehh.

looking at friendster and facebook, it's like, how many pple in ur friends list do you really stay in contact with?

people change when they grow up. friends come and go. no big deal. but it's kind of sad when close friends slowly drift away from you.

and it's all my fault maybe. hehh.

i dunno. i'm just not living up to expectations i guess.

it's probably just me.

hai.

short post (:

2007-07-16T10:33:00.000+08:00

wahaha usin i too lazy to put tagboard. hahahahs. that's why my tagboard gone liaos. hahahs. anyway let's go kbox someday! so cui lar the last time i went shld be years ago. hahahhas. okay maybe not that cui. erps.

i got a new watch! yay!! it's a swatch! (:

happy neh, coz it's damn chio! hahahas.

ermm let's see, i'm counting dominoes now, and i'm going to check out BOSS biddings later. i wonder how many i got man. hahahhas

that's all! :D

cocooned life

2007-07-14T23:10:00.000+08:00

hahas been living in a cocoon for the past few days. actually only three days were spent liddat but it feels as though it's very very long neh! (:

been happy (:

hahahs after being sucked from my happiness for a while because of this and that which i won't be elaborating coz yar they aren't very happy memories. hahas but still, glad that i walked out of it neh! (:

watched mervyn's percussion concert on friday the 13th! hahahas. it was damn good lar! he's damn zai. dunno how he rmb but somehow he can rmb the rhythm and beat and everything for a total of 8 out of the 10 songs performed! hahahas. and the best part is, i didn't fall asleep! HAHAHA! means my musical talents are growing man. wahahah. maybe i'll be a musician soon! hahahas

but then again, being in a cocoon means that i dunno wad most of my frens are going thru. was kind of trying to take a break. hehh. and i felt really bad ):

so pple, if u aren't okay, please be okay yar??? do take care leh!! ):

and yup that's another short update of my life! (:

long time no see!! :D

2007-07-11T23:05:00.000+08:00

hahaha courtesy of yx and cheryl who kindly reminded me how dead this space is...i shall blog!! helloooooos!

*brush aside cobwebs and spiders*

today celebrated yx's bday neh! made a whole 1 hr video for her! hahahas felt such a sense of satisfaction when i see her laugh almost the whole way. hahahas. and we actually managed to play it on that xbox system when the counter lady kept telling us that it only plays original dvds! hahahahs so happy neh! (:

well been busy with dominoes. think i can communicate with them soon. maybe can say their language soon. like topple with them or sth. wahahaha! okay not funny. hahahas

i suspect i lack a life! T_T but it'll be over soon! and i'm sure that by the 29 jul, i'll be able to feel a sense of satisfaction when it's all over! woohoots. just like huangcheng i hope (:

hmmms nothing much to update abt personal life except that i've been waking up at primary school hours and sleeping at uni hours. BOOOOs! T_T

so me no sleep + eat a lot = getting fatter + more pimples. hurhurhur.

but it's okay! i'm still staying happy n everything! hahahs. and i miss kbox!! ):

and i hope school doesn't start so soon leh!!! T_T

updates (:

2007-06-05T12:32:00.000+08:00

attended my friend's wake. hmmms. i din go and see him in the end. think i'll be super affected if i did. hehh. went there with leon. apparently he said it's better that i din go and see him bah. read up the straits times article about the whole incident. felt rather calm after that. hehh. maybe it's too sudden so dunno wad to expect as well.

been thinking quite a lot after that though. coz like wad leon said, it's quite a waste of talent. and somemore he's so young..20 only. scary that someone of my age just passed away like that, so suddenly. hmmms. hehh i just kind of remind myself to regularly eat my medicine. hehh.

have been in a daze since i got back. T__T hahahs. guess it's the flu and mosquito bites and tiredness bah. hahas been ignoring dominoes for quite a while now. shld be time to get some work done but dunno where to start also. afterall, been gone for 10 days, and they did quite a lot of work within these 10 days. hehh. CUI. hahahs

but other than that i'm in a good mood. just tired i guess (: but to quote cheryl, wahahah when am i not tired. *shakes head* i suspect i got zi nue tendencies. wahahaha. will upload the hongkong photos soon! when i haf the time and bothers to do so lar hor? (:

back (:

2007-06-02T18:52:00.000+08:00

hmmms. actually dunno why i put the smiley face. maybe it's coz i'm really happy to be back. for once i've stayed long enough in a country. i do like hong kong, to some extent, but i realise i really prefer it here, when it's a matter of 10 days. hahas.

returned home happily. before leon called me to tell me that one of our frens died. it's like... i dunno. seems not that long ago that that friend told me to go eat lunch with him someday. and we kept postponing that lunch coz both of us are not free. and now that i'm just away for 10 days, he's just not there anymore. i dunno how to explain it. i'm not sad to the extent that i'm sobbing my heart out or sth. but it's more like a feeling of emptiness. i dun even know whether i shld go attend his wake later before he gets cremated tmr.

not the kind of ending i thought up of for my hong kong trip actually. heh. surprisingly i'm just numb. plainly numb. probably after 2 hours i'm still kind of shocked. because it feels so wrong. his msn is still there. his hp no. is still in my phone. it just doesn't feel like he's not there anymore. and so young. he's the same age as me. makes it even harder to believe. because he seems so healthy every time i see him. how can it ever suddenly just happen like that?

pardon me. nobody i directly know, with the exception of my landlord, has died. i never attended any wakes before. i know this sounds stupid, but i never expected anyone from my life to be gone. maybe i took them for granted ):

hmm.

to all my darling friends, pls pls all take care. take loads and loads of care yar?

hong kong here i come!! (:

2007-05-23T21:39:00.000+08:00

-beams- finally time for me to go hong kong for my vacation trip (: yays! looking forward to the great break ahead! hohoho :D will be taking cathay pacific! (: I love cathay pacific! hahahas. think my dilbert will keep me entertained for long enough. hahahas

take care k all of u? (:

cya when i get back!! ^__^

this is another cui entry.

2007-05-22T09:52:00.000+08:00

haha. guess where was i the past 2 days. i was getting busy being almost knocked down by cars. i wonder sometimes whether issit i blind or cars can teleport. since science haven't progressed to the stage where anything can teleport, i guess i'm blind. HAI. hahas.

anyway went to the zoo yesterday! woohoots! that was a good break from everything. and i'll get my real break when hongkong trip comes. i hope. hahas. because the sad thing is, i dunno whether the trip will be enjoyable. HAI. given the current situation in my family. booos ):

hahahs but it's okay (: wanyi is strong neh~~! hahahas. and she got plenty of things on her mind to fill her mind with so doubt she got time to hu si luan xiang also lar hor? hahahs

but she misses her frens neh! esp aft talking to cheryl n yx on the phone that night, bleahs, really miss 38-ing with them about every other person's gossip. hahahah. and of coz, about life itself, as we grow older and older. BOOOOs! T_T but anyway, i'm still 19! muahaha! :p i know this will probably earn me slaps from pple who already got pass the 20 barrier, but still, i'm 19!!!! :D hahahahah

-gloat at 20 plus pple-

hahahas. okay lar just plain being evil. hahahs. anyway i think growing up doesn't make me less blur when i walk n everything. doesn't really change me in that sense much, so doesn't really matter lar hor? i just don't want any of my skin cells to sag. not even one of them. MUAHAHA.

and i dunno wad i'm blogging anymore also, hahahs morning blues neh! :p i think i shall go and watch the super old chi show that'll be showing on channel 8. pple who are too free, pls go watch it too. it's quite interesting to see how pple used to dress up :p

my cui day

2007-05-20T10:32:00.000+08:00

long time no see~~~! (:

*brush aside cobwebs*

hahahahs.

this is the 150th post of my blog! woah! :D

given such an occasion, i shall blog about one of my cui incidents recently again. aka yesterday. ahahas.

went breakfast with wt at tampines yesterday. too long nv see her liao so i happily ran towards her to hug her in my enthu-ness like usual. then my imaginary adam's apple got stuck at her shoulder. basically i choked myself. -__-'''

then we went cafe cartel. we had a hard time coming up with the payment of the breakfast because we were trying to take out all the coins that we have. hahahas. then we went to the cashier to pay. but a bit cui. i fell off my chair while getting off. and landed right between 2 chairs, on the floor -__-''' and my armpits, in order to break the fall, landed on the edge of the table beside our table -__- luckily there was nobody sitting there. but that's not the point!! i ended up with a blue-black at my left armpit can?!!! tsk tsk tsk. can't believe that's happening to me lar. so paiseh. i landed with a crash n everyone stared at me -__- and the coins rolled all over the floor. in the end we suffered a loss of $1. T_T boos. hahahs. so i had to pay an extra $1 since the coin is nowhere to be found ):

and then after that i nearly tripped to my death. hahahs touch wood. just exaggerating. but still, i tripped -__-'''

so yar it felt like a cui day. hahahas (:

randomness after so long. hahahs

2007-05-14T23:36:00.000+08:00

cheryl told me yesterday that we are became more serious. heh. ):

i don't like growing up ):

but looking at old posts really makes one feel more grown up, or at least, feel that you've been through a lot of things already. like wow, how time flies. HAI.

i use to wish i could turn back time so that i can correct some aspect of my life. but now my attitude is more of just see how things go. let nature take its course and see what happens. less planning and less thoughts. good for me probably, but perhaps not for the people around me. hmmms.

i'm wondering if i care less for the people around me. or at least appear to bah. i dunno how to explain but i really care the sam amount, and i really do still care a lot. but somehow my actions aren't showing it. so i presume i'm turning more horrible. HAI.

watched bridge today. made me realise i must treasure the pple ard me, coz life is just super fragile ): u never know wad will happen *touch wood* so yar lor, try not to live with regrets or in regrets i guess.

just follow ur heart perhaps?

2007-05-09T10:05:00.000+08:00

felt much better after getting a nice complete sleep yesterday. slept before 12! after such a long time (: feel much more refreshed and much better. finally i'm not waking up every other hour in the night. and i woke up feeling great at 8am. wow. hahas. my ability to wake up early nowadays amazes me.

think i replenished about half of the energy that i've drained (:

maybe today would be better afterall (:

2007-05-08T19:58:00.000+08:00

today i felt vulnerable. like i don't have the strength to carry on being strong. i hope tomorrow will be better.

la la la

2007-05-05T22:58:00.000+08:00

oh yar. reminder from cheryl. forgot to credit her for the story of that big O! HAHA how could I? =P sorry yar? (:

oh anyway had a heart-to-heart talk in the park today with my mom. felt much better (:

went to see the chi doc. woohoot! (: he say i got better! wahaha must be due to my calmness in handling stuff. wahahah.

it's a sign for me to carry on (: and i shall be strong and carry on with life (:

又来了。

2007-05-05T16:13:00.000+08:00

也许我最脆弱的就是太会故作坚强。

撑久了都不知道我在撑什么。

好累。

The Missing Piece Meets the Big O

2007-05-03T10:14:00.000+08:00

a really meaningful story. go read:

http://bigo.osorhan.com/index.htm

felt rather inspired by the story (: Every one of us often expects others to complete what they lack, but actually, what they lack is not someone to complete them. nobody would be good enough to fit another forever, because like the missing piece, we grow (: so instead of expecting someone to fit us all the time in order to be "complete", we must take initiative to "smoothen our edges" first. so we can't continue sitting there waiting for someone to pick us up. it's time that we dare to try different things, and take the opportunity to learn and gain experience, letting us proceed on with life smoothly. it's not about expectations of others around us to help us along the way, because the expectations will just grow and grow. it's about being more independent so that we can help ourselves up when we are down. and so that we can be beside our other half, and not dependent on each other totally the whole way. or else, the journey would be tedious for both. (:

hmmms. but it reminds me of a quote though:

"就算地球上少了那一个人，它也不会因为少了那一个人而停止旋转。没有一个人少了另一个人是不能活下去的。" it may sound super realistic, but i guess it's the truth. we all have to have the courage to continue on with life even if anything unfortunate happens. *touch wood* hahahs.

be strong~! (:

lil piggy~!

2007-05-03T00:39:00.000+08:00

woohoot! adopted a lil piggy! =) yays! hahahas got more things to do now. like i can feed her apple! or spray water onto her! HAHAHAHAH!

just hover ur mouse over "more"! :D then u can hear her chomp the apple away!

HAHAHA! =)

another week passed (:

2007-04-29T13:35:00.000+08:00

week 2 of hols passed! woohoots! super busy like usual with the dominoes preparations so wells, no time to blog. HAHAHA. shall do up a decent blog entry now that i'm SUPER free at home! (:

been up to no good the past few days, going to school for meetings and all. hahahas. rather be shopping and lazing at home watching movies, blah blah. that's wad one's supposed to do when it's the HOLIDAYS right. HAHAHA. met up with yixuan on thur though, that was a great break though beng lost his wallet that day (along with EVERY card you can think of -__-''') But yayy at least got to shop around a tini weeni bit.

was super duper touched on monday and friday though. monday was coz i received this really long email from one of my close frens. felt bad aft reading it though, coz i haven't been sparing much thought for his feelings for a long time. so yups. but i still haven't replied him!! T_T i'm such a horrible friend these days. HAI. and i really mean it, think i've been a HORRIBLE fren to my closest friends, like hazel, my nuns, yx, etc. ): HRMPH, have to do something about it! Esp since their exams going to finish soon. Eh let's go out aft your exams end k!! (:

Miss all my nuns ): Booos. Not that there's many but bleahs, cancelled on one fellow nun's mugging session on sunday, felt SO bad ): sorry wor nun! hahahas but seeing our status on facebook cheered me up. HAHAHAH. "dated since 1987 and are practically married" HAHAHA. my very amusing fellow nun that loves chewing on bamboo and in love with pp. HURHURHUR. remember our date on monday night k! (:

the other nun is busy with her exams. BOOOOs. then our taiwan nunnery trip hows?? ): hahahas. been disturbing her a lot though, i think i'm proudly the distraction from her exams by suan-ing her online almost every night while she mugged. HAHAHA. haiyos but seriously feel quite bad towards you also ): coz think been so busy that i dunno wad u r up to these days. (like whether u got caught and put back into the hospital yet :p) sorry yar? ): don't even know wad u meant by the hippo tour job. HAI. ):

family issues had been on my mind the past weeks so yar not exactly in the best of moods everyday. but now okay liaos (: or rather i feel okay liaos. hahahas.

oh i forgot to say why i touched on friday. coz mervyn leon wuhui jeremy went to the dominoes thing!! and they joined!! leon as subcomm/main comm logistics with me, then the rest as faci-s! (: SOOoooo happy when i saw them, missed them quite a lot too since i long long long time nv talk or go out with them liaos. okay technically it's only one week, but compared to seeing them everyday one week is quite long right. hahahas. somehow got the feeling i dragged them into this, tt's why felt quite bad, but they came. told us that they interest level 10 and everything during the interview. yar v v thankful for them (:

played CS on friday with mervyn leon jeremy after the interview. HOHOHO. so fun!!! :D though i kept dying in the game -__-''' and i think i caused our grp (me n leon) to lose. hahahah but not bad for a first timer lar =P i'm getting so good at self-consolation. hahahahs.

and long time no outing with the sheep also. ): hrmph. think her exams haven't ended. tsk tsk tsk. i really need to go out with these girls!! hahahs. *despo look* otherwise i'll feel like i got no hols at all liaos. T_T hahahas

okay, let's see, what else have i missed out. oh yar, grades. hahahas. my grades this sem is damn cui compared to last sem lar, though i got a range of grades again! but errrr i think my range shifted to the left (aka the not-so-good grades) hahahs:

TWC: B-
BGS: B
Stats: B+
MA: A-
AS: A
CT: A

BOOOs. no A+ like last sem liaos. and worst grade dropped from B to B-. T_T and wow, my gpa cuied from 3.75 to 3.34, giving a cumulative GPA of 3.52. hmmms. next sem must study harder, n get more life. hahahas.

what else...hmmms. my gastric probs are back again to haunt me, giving me dizziness again. HAI. so i'm now back on medication. BOOOs. it taste horrible. bleahs.

other than that, well nothing else for the moment, i'm blissful (:

week 1 of break

2007-04-22T22:41:00.000+08:00

hahahs maybe i shld change my blog to weekly updates of shu wanyi or sth. erps. hahahs.

anyway here's week 1:

monday
think i was more or less stuck at home. watching hana kimi. more likely trying desperately to load hana kimi on youtube. ironically youtube doesn't want to be loaded.

tuesday
bgs outing (: went cathay to watch the stupid show called the last mimzy. it's really kind of stupid. HAI. hahahs got to know my cui BGS grade. but okay lar, better than i thot, at least not a C. hahas.

wednesday
phantom of the opera. courtesy of zh. damn damn damn nice!! they got damn nice props, damn nice cast, damn nice everything! perfect lar huh? hahas

thursday
dota n sushi buffet. courtesy of bro. hahahs. dota seems fun actually. though a bit cheem. dun worry i'll conquer it. hahaha :D

friday
stay @ home day again. BOOOs. hahahs okay lar at least got my bro to accompany me. went vivo with momo and bro. woohoot! nice dinner n nice scenery~! (:

saturday
meeting in sch. rosyth parents day. jurong east cc. jurong west cc. bishan. home. damn tiring day. kept walking. first day of joining tri-touch for their SMU dominoes of dreams main comm as logistics head. woohoot! but got a lot of items to find. hahahs feels like treasure hunt. think it'll be fun (:

sunday
island trip ard singapore again. city hall. suntec. bugis. chinatown. lil india. farrer park. home. vivo. TIRED. booos. in search of quotations for items on the list. hahahas legs gonna break. but not bad lar, had fun (:

WOOHOOT!

2007-04-13T23:54:00.000+08:00

exams are finally over!! (:

now i got nth to do. no plans at the moment. i shall enjoy my break and relaxxx~ (:

these few days have been really muggish. just yesterday me n leon stayed in sch till 11 plus to finish papers. oman -__-

and today for once i was late for my exam. wow. hahaha. okay lar it's was a mere 2 minutes late and i finished the paper before the allocated time. but still. interesting experience neh~! hahahs

will blog more when i feel less sleepy. hahahas

CT

2007-04-05T21:23:00.000+08:00

CT is finally over! which means i can finally start mugging for my exams. wow, i got only 3 days left to my first paper and i haven't started on anything. HAI.

CT was fun lar actually, despite everything, i think we really did a good job, with all the effects and everything. so glad tt kwang kept coming to tell us tt he won't forget about our exhibition (: felt a great sense of accomplishment. hahahs followed by cui-ness from staying up to photoshop till 3 am on tue, and then staying overnight in sch yesterday to prepare for the exhibition. we didn't catch a single wink of sleep at all. all the way till me yx n char went gloria jeans for breakfast. and we fell asleep aft eating our breakfast, right there on the couches. hahas. win right.

CT grp is an interesting mix of characters. got to know suyi (ironically she was in all my classes last sem but i almost never talked to her), iris, yonghua, char and yangwei better. wahaha. interesting lar. we all have diff personalities so prob din click tt well at first. but so super happy that our creative pdt turned out well! :D

but cui-ness aft ct made me ramble a lot of things tt i felt tt i shldn't have said lar, in tt sis room. hai. but wadever lar, forget it. hahas. wad is said can't be unsaid. though if got another chance i'll phrase it nicer coz i dun really mean wad i said. hahas

now still feel super cui. only slept 2 hrs just now when i reached home. think i better slp more. hahas nitez! :)

2007-03-31T21:03:00.000+08:00

bgs bgs bgs! OMG bgs! T_T all the margins and everything! Boooos! i think it takes longer to do out the entire formatting of the document rather than the 3000 report itself lor! bleahs! -__-

and still have to do ct project.

and still got loads of stuff to read before exams!!! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

okay. i need a schedule!

by this weekend i must finish bgs.
the other days...i'll go think abt it after i settle bgs. hahaha

disclaimer: dun worry i'm not stressed out or anything. i'm just well, complaining. HAHA.

my cui-ing days are over!!

2007-03-28T17:02:00.000+08:00

Heyyy~! Hahaha okay for the time being my cui-ing days are over (:

BGS was over yesterday. piahed our presentation all the way till 3am tt night before the presentation and i think we did a really good job considering all of us are so tired. with the exception of that stupid guy in my grp tt siam off so early.

anyway i must blog about my wonderful friends! hahahah! been receiving a lot of food these days from random friends. wahaha. tt night which i was piahing the bgs presentation, zhihao bought me ben n jerry's ice-cream! and then leon treated me to kiwi strawberry snapple! hahaha. then today i got a choc bar from jeremy! for ma, richmond treated me to half a dozen of donuts from the donut factory! :D Hahahah

and i must thank my xiong mao jiejie for talking to me almost every night so that we can hear each other grumble about our respective xiong mao lives. hahahah

and of coz i must thank my darling beng and sylvia and shifu for helping me to buy stuff these days coz i'm like too lazy n tired to move around much. oh dear, i'm really behaving like a freaky xiong mao! ):

and thanks to all who heard me grumble and ramble! (:

oh anyway i found an inspiring speech on jessie's blog (read it if u r free, it's rather long)

Text of Steve Jobs’ Commencement address (2005)This is the text of the Commencement address by Steve Jobs, CEO of Apple Computer and of Pixar Animation Studios, delivered on June 12, 2005.

I am honored to be with you today at your commencement from one of the finest universities in the world. I never graduated from college. Truth be told, this is the closest I’ve ever gotten to a college graduation. Today I want to tell you three stories from my life. That’s it. No big deal. Just three stories.

The first story is about connecting the dots.

I dropped out of Reed College after the first 6 months, but then stayed around as a drop-in for another 18 months or so before I really quit. So why did I drop out?

It started before I was born. My biological mother was a young, unwed college graduate student, and she decided to put me up for adoption. She felt very strongly that I should be adopted by college graduates, so everything was all set for me to be adopted at birth by a lawyer and his wife. Except that when I popped out they decided at the last minute that they really wanted a girl. So my parents, who were on a waiting list, got a call in the middle of the night asking: “We have an unexpected baby boy; do you want him?” They said: “Of course.” My biological mother later found out that my mother had never graduated from college and that my father had never graduated from high school. She refused to sign the final adoption papers. She only relented a few months later when my parents promised that I would someday go to college.

And 17 years later I did go to college. But I naively chose a college that was almost as expensive as Stanford, and all of my working-class parents’ savings were being spent on my college tuition. After six months, I couldn’t see the value in it. I had no idea what I wanted to do with my life and no idea how college was going to help me figure it out. And here I was spending all of the money my parents had saved their entire life. So I decided to drop out and trust that it would all work out OK. It was pretty scary at the time, but looking back it was one of the best decisions I ever made. The minute I dropped out I could stop taking the required classes that didn’t interest me, and begin dropping in on the ones that looked interesting.

It wasn’t all romantic. I didn’t have a dorm room, so I slept on the floor in friends’ rooms, I returned coke bottles for the 5¢ deposits to buy food with, and I would walk the 7 miles across town every Sunday night to get one good meal a week at the Hare Krishna temple. I loved it. And much of what I stumbled into by following my curiosity and intuition turned out to be priceless later on. Let me give you one example:

Reed College at that time offered perhaps the best calligraphy instruction in the country. Throughout the campus every poster, every label on every drawer, was beautifully hand calligraphed. Because I had dropped out and didn’t have to take the normal classes, I decided to take a calligraphy class to learn how to do this. I learned about serif and san serif typefaces, about varying the amount of space between different letter combinations, about what makes great typography great. It was beautiful, historical, artistically subtle in a way that science can’t capture, and I found it fascinating.

None of this had even a hope of any practical application in my life. But ten years later, when we were designing the first Macintosh computer, it all came back to me. And we designed it all into the Mac. It was the first computer with beautiful typography. If I had never dropped in on that single course in college, the Mac would have never had multiple typefaces or proportionally spaced fonts. And since Windows just copied the Mac, its likely that no personal computer would have them. If I had never dropped out, I would have never dropped in on this calligraphy class, and personal computers might not have the wonderful typography that they do. Of course it was impossible to connect the dots looking forward when I was in college. But it was very, very clear looking backwards ten years later.

Again, you can’t connect the dots looking forward; you can only connect them looking backwards. So you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future. You have to trust in something — your gut, destiny, life, karma, whatever. This approach has never let me down, and it has made all the difference in my life.

My second story is about love and loss.

I was lucky — I found what I loved to do early in life. Woz and I started Apple in my parents garage when I was 20. We worked hard, and in 10 years Apple had grown from just the two of us in a garage into a $2 billion company with over 4000 employees. We had just released our finest creation — the Macintosh — a year earlier, and I had just turned 30. And then I got fired. How can you get fired from a company you started? Well, as Apple grew we hired someone who I thought was very talented to run the company with me, and for the first year or so things went well. But then our visions of the future began to diverge and eventually we had a falling out. When we did, our Board of Directors sided with him. So at 30 I was out. And very publicly out. What had been the focus of my entire adult life was gone, and it was devastating.

I really didn’t know what to do for a few months. I felt that I had let the previous generation of entrepreneurs down - that I had dropped the baton as it was being passed to me. I met with David Packard and Bob Noyce and tried to apologize for screwing up so badly. I was a very public failure, and I even thought about running away from the valley. But something slowly began to dawn on me — I still loved what I did. The turn of events at Apple had not changed that one bit. I had been rejected, but I was still in love. And so I decided to start over.

I didn’t see it then, but it turned out that getting fired from Apple was the best thing that could have ever happened to me. The heaviness of being successful was replaced by the lightness of being a beginner again, less sure about everything. It freed me to enter one of the most creative periods of my life.

During the next five years, I started a company named NeXT, another company named Pixar, and fell in love with an amazing woman who would become my wife. Pixar went on to create the worlds first computer animated feature film, Toy Story, and is now the most successful animation studio in the world. In a remarkable turn of events, Apple bought NeXT, I returned to Apple, and the technology we developed at NeXT is at the heart of Apple’s current renaissance. And Laurene and I have a wonderful family together.

I’m pretty sure none of this would have happened if I hadn’t been fired from Apple. It was awful tasting medicine, but I guess the patient needed it. Sometimes life hits you in the head with a brick. Don’t lose faith. I’m convinced that the only thing that kept me going was that I loved what I did. You’ve got to find what you love. And that is as true for your work as it is for your lovers. Your work is going to fill a large part of your life, and the only way to be truly satisfied is to do what you believe is great work. And the only way to do great work is to love what you do. If you haven’t found it yet, keep looking. Don’t settle. As with all matters of the heart, you’ll know when you find it. And, like any great relationship, it just gets better and better as the years roll on. So keep looking until you find it. Don’t settle.

My third story is about death.

When I was 17, I read a quote that went something like: “If you live each day as if it was your last, someday you’ll most certainly be right.” It made an impression on me, and since then, for the past 33 years, I have looked in the mirror every morning and asked myself: “If today were the last day of my life, would I want to do what I am about to do today?” And whenever the answer has been “No” for too many days in a row, I know I need to change something.
Remembering that I’ll be dead soon is the most important tool I’ve ever encountered to help me make the big choices in life. Because almost everything — all external expectations, all pride, all fear of embarrassment or failure - these things just fall away in the face of death, leaving only what is truly important. Remembering that you are going to die is the best way I know to avoid the trap of thinking you have something to lose. You are already naked. There is no reason not to follow your heart.

About a year ago I was diagnosed with cancer. I had a scan at 7:30 in the morning, and it clearly showed a tumor on my pancreas. I didn’t even know what a pancreas was. The doctors told me this was almost certainly a type of cancer that is incurable, and that I should expect to live no longer than three to six months. My doctor advised me to go home and get my affairs in order, which is doctor’s code for prepare to die. It means to try to tell your kids everything you thought you’d have the next 10 years to tell them in just a few months. It means to make sure everything is buttoned up so that it will be as easy as possible for your family. It means to say your goodbyes.

I lived with that diagnosis all day. Later that evening I had a biopsy, where they stuck an endoscope down my throat, through my stomach and into my intestines, put a needle into my pancreas and got a few cells from the tumor. I was sedated, but my wife, who was there, told me that when they viewed the cells under a microscope the doctors started crying because it turned out to be a very rare form of pancreatic cancer that is curable with surgery. I had the surgery and I’m fine now.

This was the closest I’ve been to facing death, and I hope its the closest I get for a few more decades. Having lived through it, I can now say this to you with a bit more certainty than when death was a useful but purely intellectual concept:

No one wants to die. Even people who want to go to heaven don’t want to die to get there. And yet death is the destination we all share. No one has ever escaped it. And that is as it should be, because Death is very likely the single best invention of Life. It is Life’s change agent. It clears out the old to make way for the new. Right now the new is you, but someday not too long from now, you will gradually become the old and be cleared away. Sorry to be so dramatic, but it is quite true.

Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life. Don’t be trapped by dogma — which is living with the results of other people’s thinking. Don’t let the noise of others’ opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.

When I was young, there was an amazing publication called The Whole Earth Catalog, which was one of the bibles of my generation. It was created by a fellow named Stewart Brand not far from here in Menlo Park, and he brought it to life with his poetic touch. This was in the late 1960’s, before personal computers and desktop publishing, so it was all made with typewriters, scissors, and polaroid cameras. It was sort of like Google in paperback form, 35 years before Google came along: it was idealistic, and overflowing with neat tools and great notions.

Stewart and his team put out several issues of The Whole Earth Catalog, and then when it had run its course, they put out a final issue. It was the mid-1970s, and I was your age. On the back cover of their final issue was a photograph of an early morning country road, the kind you might find yourself hitchhiking on if you were so adventurous. Beneath it were the words: “Stay Hungry. Stay Foolish.” It was their farewell message as they signed off. Stay Hungry. Stay Foolish. And I have always wished that for myself. And now, as you graduate to begin anew, I wish that for you.

Stay Hungry. Stay Foolish.

Thank you all very much.

i need some reassurance.

2007-03-25T09:30:00.000+08:00

i feel so horrible the recent weeks. in the sense that i am very calculative or sth. coz apparently the pple tt's ard me dun seem to feel it, then i'm the only one who gets upset. hurhurhur.

i'm talking abt my bgs grp.

they are nice pple, really. they are damn nice friends to be with. but when it comes to work i'm like speechless. they do their work. so why am i complaining? coz they just follow wadever me n my fren says. they never ever disagree with us. so a normal meeting is just sit there and wait for us to tell them wad to do. and reminder, we are friends. so i feel really horrible doing that even though they keep telling me tt they dun mind. HAI. and it doesn't help when my fellow fren (the other one tt they listen to) is ALWAYS late. and these few weeks, ridiculously late.

on monday when we were supposed to see prof, she was 1 1/2 hours late. the meeting was at 2, she turned up at 3.30. and i got a stupid ma test to study for and i was thinking why am i just wasting my time sitting there stoning. truth is even if the meeting ended early i knew i probably still won't study MA yet but the feeling of just sitting ard doing nothing is just crap. because she didn't even tell us that she's gonna be late until we called her at 3. and she was still at home. HUR. and the reason was because she wanted to feed her cat. but the others dun seem to mind tt she'll be that late. seems like i'm the only one who minds. and why can't we go see prof first? u might ask. that's because they said must wait for her to see prof, because "she's the only one that knows wad is going on with the project." when i heard that, i was really really pengz already. HUR. so they dunno wad is going on with the proj? or they think i dunno wad's gg on with the proj aft so much hard work put in by me n my fren? or wad? i misinterpretated them somehow? hur.

anyway the story hasn't ended yet. i decided to call her to tell her tt we go and wait to see prof first. coz the last time we met prof we had to wait at least 1/2 hour for her. so okay, we went up to level 5. and then we met a classmate who told us tt prof is in a bad bad mood. and prof is seeing nobody now, so we could just approach her immediately. so of coz, since they wanted to wait for my fren, i suggested gg back down or sit around somewhere to wait. and the one tt said the "she's the only one.." decided to ask me: "wth? u make me come all the way up here just to go down?" by then i was damn pissed already. so i just replied curtly that "well, somebody said we MUST wait for her before we go approach prof wad. wad can i do?"

and so we went down. and i tried to keep my cool while i gave them one last chance. i asked the same guy "u mean u all dunno wad is going on with the project so far? why didn't u all ask me when we were just sitting ard just now?" haha believe me, i asked it super duper calmly. and guess his answer. "no. of coz we know lar. hahahah. why?"

PENGZ PENGZ PENGZ PENGZ

so wth are they trying to do?! -.- ARGH. and the worst thing is that 2 of them got to leave at 3. so they left, leaving me and another guy to wait for my dear fren. HURHURHUR. when she reached she called but i was outside the room somewhere to talk to wt coz i needed to cool down. so i called her back, thinking she dunno the room that we are in. and she din pick up. then when i got back to the room i told her i called her, and she replied nonchalantly "i know." and i was just happening to think "then why didn't you bother to pick up?"

--

that was monday. had another bgs meeting yesterday. we supposed to meet at 9am. and the rest of us just decided that we shld meet at 9.30 instead since she's going to be damn late anyway. BUT guess wad? she was 4 1/2 hours late. Conveniently turned up only at 1.30pm. and no, it wasn't because she woke up late or sth. she was online. obviously i went to ask her why she's still at home, and she told me oh she just thought tt she shld be at home researching videos and dl-ing them for our bgs presentation. when she knew we needed her for the more important parts of the proj. because one of them has already went to find the videos already?! but the rest were just saying stuff like wth wad is she doing at home and everything. and asking me wad is she doing at home. HUR. but yet again they don't seem that bothered as well. coz they weren't upset with her or anything. they just, being so accomodating, wait for me to tell them wad to do, and the meeting goes on. i wasn't even fuming yesterday already. i just mentally gave up on that person who's always late.

it's one thing to be always late, but only for a while? but it's another thing to be deliberately late, knowing tt ur grp members might need u in order to compile all the stupid slides together. it just shows whether you spare a thought for others when doing something. and it just shows that you don't.

in the end we did it by ourselves. thought up of the second round of survey questions and sent it out. went through all their slides for them to make sure it's okay. researched on the models we are using. ran through the victim video and cut out wadever we'll need. did up practically all the details that we needed for the presentation.

and i was supposed to design the slides and compile everything when the rest are done with their changes. by the time she turned up, another one of our grp member has to leave already. and our meeting was more or less over. just went to the library (since the booking for the SR tt we were in ended already) to look thru all the slides, explained to her wad is going on so far, and did a mini run-through of the presentation.

and as i told u, i totally gave up on her already. so i didn't even feel any irritation. hurhurhur. but one of my dear grp member told me online tt not only he's accomodating wad, i'm also accomodating her so much. HUR. couldn't even be bothered to explain that i'm not accomodating her, i just can't be bothered to say anything about it anymore. the proj is gg to end anyway, it's no point. and i dun think she'll care, honestly. she's too used to pple accomodating her for whatever she does.

--

that being said, i still feel horrible. because the rest don't seem to mind at all. and they are all my friends. and i dun usually bother abt friends' punctuality. (i'm not a time-keeping freak or sth) so i'm like always thinking, is it just me?! am i being unreasonable or sth to be upset over such things?

wadever. i miss my last sem's grp mates. i miss my biz law grp, i miss my comms grp, i miss my ltb grp.

and i hope this term ends soon enough.

--

okay now that i've cooled down totally. HAI. a bit guilty about what is said above also. bleahs. i just hope that our proj will be okay. yupps. jiayous everyone!

rambles no. 349826327482374

2007-03-22T20:39:00.000+08:00

soooooo tired! boos. after ma test and piahing ma report yesterday. and nope, i haven't piah-ed finished yet. and we changed our ct idea! boos. means more work to look forward to. hurhurhur. and there's bgs major proj presentation nx week. ma report due nx week. ct individual assignment due on an unknown date. stats quiz nx week. BLEAHS. i'm just soooo going to be brain fatiguish. aka have a fatigue brain. ERRR. hahahah

huangcheng!

2007-03-19T22:32:00.000+08:00

okay this is like SO late because i watched huangcheng like last last sun? anyway i'm blogging abt it coz i happen to look thru my hp's pics and realise tt there are some pics tt i wanted to blog but forgot about. the pics are of the food that me n jessie ate at this super nice restaurant at marina square (:

so here they are ^_^ :

this is our soup! (: And the best thing is, it's SOLID! it's not those watery watery kind. there's mushrooms inside wor! errr okay mushroom bits. u aren't really expecting to see gigantic mushrooms inside a soup right. hahaha

our main course! super yummy! think it's some cod fish thingy with scallop n pasta (: damn damn nice! and it's quite filling!

because we had a super large appetitizer! it's basically a seafood platter, which had big prawns, cheese sticks, damn big calamari, and the best is, soft shell crabs!! :D

me n jessie shared a set meal which included coffee/tea, dessert (choc brownie + ice cream = damn sinful but damn good!) and of coz, the main course. we added that appetitizer ourselves. turned out to be a super xing4 fu2 meal! ^__^ hohohoho

2007-03-19T15:00:00.000+08:00

i'm so so so dotted. and i feel so pengz for being dotted over such a small thing. seriously. hur. it's not like it's the first time tt it's happening.

but yar, wadever.

maybe i need some emotions management class.

felt so happy when i finally bought the laptop casing just now. felt so relaxed eating lunch with leon mervyn seth. felt so lame when we were watching the trailer for black sheep. felt so calm when i was just playing online games in the gsr.

so why am i feeling so so so horrible now? maybe i look too happy. maybe i appear too nice. to the extent that a lot of people doesn't even give a damn about my feelings already.

argh.

sunny sunday (:

2007-03-18T12:11:00.000+08:00

no wonder they call it SUNday! coz there's always SUN on SUNday! :D hohoho

went botanical gardens yesterday with my momo n bro to let my bro learn sth abt plants. wahaha i think plan failed coz all we did was to walk ard and took photos of pretty flowers. it was more like a photography society trip or sth. wahaha. anyway i'll upload the pics soon and share the chio chio flowers with u all! :D

been kind of upset lately so the botanical gardens trip was a great break from everything. the oxygen given out by the plants during photosynthesis (errr) somehow made my brain function better! (: not that i found solutions to my problems but at least i decided to just wait and see what happens. can't be bothered to plan. hahahah.

oh and i actually bought a dress!! WOW. that just shows how disturbed i was. hahahs. doubt i'll ever wear it though. hahahs. but retail therapy is good! and i bought a polka dot top! ^_^ hahahs okay lar both are pure black n white so they don't look bimbotic. i think. hahas.

managed to piah finish all the AS stuff le. now it's twc assignment and the MA test to look 4ward to! wahaha:D

go away.

2007-03-17T10:18:00.000+08:00

please stop telling me that my moods affect your moods, that if i'm happy u're happy, and if i'm unhappy i cause u to be unhappy also. my life is not linked to your life. ur moods should not be controlled by me.

stop trying to show too much concern for my life. stop asking me what i'm eating everyday, where i'm going to everyday. i don't think i need to report my life to you.

and please stop saying things like "i'm happy coz u..." or "i'm unhappy coz u..." it has nothing to do with you? i have my own life. you should have your own too.

u don't have to go online just for me. u don't have to drag yourself to school because of me. i'm perfectly fine with being alone sometimes. hur. i might even prefer being alone sometimes. perhaps someday i'll appreciate your "sensitivity" towards my feelings, but that is when u truly is being sensitive, instead of doing things for the sake of doing them.

stop thinking you are being very nice to me, making sacrifices and all. it is not a sacrifice when you are expecting me to reciprocate your gestures.

and what do you expect me to reply to all those things that i choose not to make sense of? i used to feel guilty towards u, and i still do, but my guilt is getting lesser and lesser. we are just friends. i don't see why i have to answer to you for my actions. and you have no right to try to make me feel guilty by saying that i am the one causing whatever to you. i am not because i didn't choose to be.

i hope you'll get to your senses soon and then everything resumes to normal. what else am i supposed to do?

ignore you?

isaac's bday party

2007-03-16T09:27:00.000+08:00

reached home at about 3am this morning. woke up at 8am. realised my stats test at 12 noon is still pitifully ignored by my memory. i think i got selection memory. hahas.

anyway it was good to just relax @ isaac's house, playing board games and stuff. shall blog about it later when my brain wakes up later.

boos. i need sleep!:(

HAPPY!!!

2007-03-13T23:24:00.000+08:00

okay it's been a GREAT day for me!! after sooo long. hahahas. been bothered by all kinds of weird stuff and now it's kind of unsettled but i got happy stuff to keep me going. yeah! hahahs.

firstly, my AS presentation is over!! (: i'm not happy over the fact tt it's over coz i'm darn happy with my grp members - sylvia, weili n tini! they've been great pple to work with, really. and thanks to this proj i got to chat so much with them which is really enjoyable (: glad tt the class enjoyed it more or less, not the best perhaps compared to others, but we put in our best efforts to try make it entertaining n content-based at the same time. wahaha one of the fun proj tt i'm proud of this sem!

oh anyway the proj i enjoyed a lot last sem was biz law, and towards the end, my ltb (:

secondly, i cleared up a misunderstanding with one of my good frens in SMU!!!! (: happy neh~! hahahs basically our sms-es just didn't get to each other, and funny thing is it went on for almost the entire sem so we both thot each other changed and somehow decided to ignore the other person. hahahas. lame right. okay we finally cleared it up and we are back to good old days! (:

and i got to go home early today! and ate kfc! :D and slowly slack the day away. it's time to give myself a break! hohoho :D

and i bought the mr. bean hp chain. damn damn damn cute!!! :D

slacking! =)

2007-03-09T21:50:00.001+08:00

Yays! Slacked the whole day off today (: Woke up @ 8am today feeling happy that I've slept for a grand total of 8 hours. That's a lot compared to the few hours of sleep i've had for the past few days. wahaha (:

went school for stats. and guess wad?! i actually found stats fun! ahahahs. coz we had a 25 min break and we were let off about 20 minutes earlier. so i managed to meet cheryl for kbox at 3 instead of 4. AND WE SANG ALL THE WAY TILL 7!!! :D that's so shuang k! hahahs.

then met beng for dinner. hahas ended up eating @ bk coz couldn't find a seat @ mos. and couldn't really decide on what to eat.

so i think i need my medicine. HAI. ate too much untouchable food nowadays. T_T time to cure myself again. hahas.

great end to a weekend (:

2007-03-05T08:55:00.000+08:00

remember i mentioned tt cheryl came over to my house to mug? Wells, for dinner we had dumplings! (: and like usual we made it ourselves (we = my mom n i), and cheryl had the chance to go try make also. Haha hers was really not bad, which was rathering *ahem* shocking =P hahahs. and we were so excited with our darling dumplings tt we took photos of them. trust me, it's more like cheryl got so excited tt she made me took photos of the dumplings. hahahas. anyway here are the photos:

some of the dumplings out of the 99 we made. chio right? (:

this is made by cheryl. characterised by its zigzag sides:D

this is made by momo. characterised by its fat stuffings. hahas

this one made by yours truly. hahas characterised by its round edges:)

anyway for new year i tidied up my pig sty and now it looks fit for human habitation! *beams* haha and i'm so happy to get the blue ppg bedsheet so i must show all of you. Hahas. Look! chio right? :D

cheryl's coming to town~!

2007-03-04T18:04:00.000+08:00

hahaha okay not really coming to town. haha she came to my house today. and that si bian tai kept saying lame things while mugging with me. hahahas. for instance, she said tt my brother is shy towards "girls of the opposite sex". HAHAHA. so are there girls of the same sex as my bro? hahahah. i'm so amused! :D

anyway been really busy the past few days! ): just finished bgs midterms yesterday! (: felt so happy aft finishing it. HOHOHO. and i'm behaving like a si bian tai these days. hahas, which i shan't elaborate why. Long time never really talk to leon n mervyn they all though! Sob. Been busy with my MA project n BGS midterms ): Boos. hopefully nx week not that bad, but i predict it to be worse. hahahas.

oh did i mention i got ORANGE manicure?? =D So happy! Though i think it makes me look slutty -__-''' Did it with ah head when she came to ps to visit me! (okay not really visit me, just happen to be there. haha) YAY!! I finally got orange nails. bwahahahah. but they are a lil too bright so i prob won't attempt them again aft a long while. hahahs.

and i've kindly unblocked the stalker from my msn. coz i feel evil blocking anyone. HAI. pathetic me. ahahas. but glad tt he leaves me alone more with my busy mode on. hahahs.

nx week...hmms got AS assignment, TWC presentation, TWC assignment, and other projects to meet up for T_T boos!! time is passing too fast man! it's already week 10 into the second term. scary neh!! ): hahas.

term break (:

2007-02-26T08:35:00.000+08:00

yoooos! :D term break is finally over! erps make me sound like i wanted it to end or sth. totally not the case can? hahas. basically slacked the entire week away, gorging on food that i'm not supposed to eat at all (as decided by my doc) and having fun~! (:

which also means, my hw is in a CMI state. but hey, do i care? hahas :p okay lar no point trying to act cool. haf to get them done soon. SOB~~~~! T__T

oh anyway i wanted to blog about my batam trip!! (: it was fun! hahas. ok lar it was fun coz got to talk to the pple from other grps in my class and they are nice pple! (: we visited quite a few factories and learnt quite a lot of interesting stuff about the industry in indonesia itself. the ceo-s were all very friendly and super frank. haha not supposed to quote what they tell us anywhere, so i can't type it here though i'm darn tempted to. hahahs. in the afternoon prof treated us to seafood (: which was not bad lar. since i love seafood! hahas. at night we stayed at a super high-class kelong. and the cute thing is that we got to sit on a sampan to get there!! while on the sampan, just look up at we see super duper a lot of stars! can't do tt in singapore lors. hahas. so the sky was super chio. the whole feeling was very comfortable. (:

basically the kelong is just a beautiful house on the sea. calling it a kelong is a bit lame coz it's so chio can?! there were karaoke room, theatre room, and nice nice bedrooms with darn soft mattresses and super cold aircon which is so sleep-inducing (: but unfortunately i din get to sleep much ): sobs. hahaha coz i was too busy playing card games and k-ing songs. hahahas. serve me right right? hahas :p i realised the pple from my class can sing man. okay some of them =P their voices are damn nice? :D hahas. went shopping too! a while only. haha but managed to buy 2 shirts (: and managed to eat A & W! so long nv eat it le. i miss its root beer float man! and curly fries! hahas. too bad it was only a one day trip. won't mind if it was maybe one day longer? :D

the next day went vegas night. hahaha. it was a bit sian at first but eventually it became quite fun since we get to play! hahahs. and there are so many pretty girls in smu lar. but i was a bit freaked out by the bunny girls. they wear so little not cold meh? hurhur. -__- and i'm not into such ball-ish stuff sia. must wear dress. SIAN. coz must walk properly in heels and try to look elegant. hahahah. i wonder how come so many girls manage to look so successful in it. hur. not my type of thing. coz honestly it's just mostly showing how pretty one can be during such things? but most pple probably dun even remember wad other pple wore to the thing. hahas so why make such a big fuss out of what to wear man? just something simple will do right. hahas. :D okay lar i shall stop complaining before some girls look at it and want to slap me for wad i type. ahahahas.

went shopping with my family at orchard the next day. aka saturday. bought 3 shirts, 1 skirt, 1 pants, 1 pair of shoes. hahaha. my belated new year shopping! :D happy neh~~!

oh then yesterday went to interview woffles wu! omg i love him lar! before i went i was honestly quite freaked out by him. when we interview him, then we realise how nice he is can?!!!! and he even let us speak to one of the patients who was kind of disfigured in a not-very-obvious extent. hur. din realise the plastic surgery industry is so pathetic in singapore. GPs can pass off as plastic surgeons and not get sued for disfiguring their patients. wad the lar. hur.

--

happy things aside, i'm darn freaked out can?! me n my fren feel so stalked by this guy that we know. he kept following us around and he keeps sms-ing and msg-ing me disgusting things. YUCK. argh. pls lar go away....!!!! i can't stand over friendly pple. -___-''''

a peek into a typical lame conversation

2007-02-24T00:56:00.000+08:00

was talking to my fren (ah head) about being able to "click" with certain pple. and being lame, this is the conversation we ended up having:

ah head says:
wow
ah head says:
u can click
ah head says:
hur hur hur
ah head says:
u a clicker?
[wanyi] says:
hahaha
[wanyi] says:
maybe i'm a mouse
[wanyi] says:
hahahs
ah head says:
good for u
ah head says:
u want some cheese?
[wanyi] says:
hahahah
[wanyi] says:
no my cheese was stolen
[wanyi] says:
i still trying to find out who's the thief
ah head says:
the three blind mice?
[wanyi] says:
hmmm probably
[wanyi] says:
they din really tell me in the book tt they wrote
[wanyi] says:
so it's still a mystery now
ah head says:
three blind mice has a booK?
ah head says:
wow
[wanyi] says:
nope they got a song
[wanyi] says:
hahahas
[wanyi] says:
they = the authors of who stole my cheese
[wanyi] says:
hahas
ah head says:
OH MAN
ah head says:
we dun seem to be very sane

--

hurhurhur.

google-ing wanyi

2007-02-19T22:17:00.000+08:00

went to google my full name. haha found quite a few weird stuff and a blog entry of fangyi's that i realise i nv read before:

Just had a 4D outing to celebrate SHU WANYI's birthday, though I wonder why do we bother to celebrate our servant's birthday. Probably because we are nice and kind masters. Aside from that, HAPPY BIRTHDAY WANYI!!! Love ya lots!! It was as usual damn fun with 4D. May, Nuah, Wanyi, Ber, Yanmin, Wenting, yuwadae, Yanling and muah went to Marche. *sobz* I splurged 30 bucks on FOOD?? We had a grand time suaning yuwadae tan who has this illusion that she was from our clique...haha..remember yuwadae, you are not from our clique, you belong to the frankenstein grp which includes weikian and tony. Brought back lots of memories about 4D, I think I can never stop loving this grp of funny and quirky bunch of ppl with our common sense of humour...easy to laugh and easy to cry. People labelled as bimbos in DHS but our friendship last so much longer than theirs. Zhiwen remembered 4D as a class where the whole class is one clique. How cool is that? We come together and chat, talk about mutual friends, bitch about non mutual friends, come together for a simple listening ear and comfort we can give each other. How often do you find that? We leave no one out in conversations...the noisy bunch of us have changed quite abit since 4D, but only in looks, we are still who we were in 4D...smart gals with great dreams...caring and never stop loving each other. We promised to be at each others wedding as bridesmaid or maids of honour...yuwadae will be the whatever matron because she wil be the first to marry( Tony when she reaches 18...wahaha) Wanyi can help sweep up after the wedding except her own..well..which she can sweep the next day. Felt so happy today. Made me remember my O level results release day. the happiest thing on that day was not my 9A1s but the moment when we stepped into 4D and sat back at our usual positions...remembering who we were. As well as when I saw May Ling cried for me when it was announced that I had gotten my 9A1s...will never ever forget that..She was so happily crying and clapping for me. The rest of the class like Wanyi were happy for me too and they were so concerned about me during my O levels. Haiz...where will I ever find a bunch of people like that. Once in a lifetime is truly enough....

--

Everything sound so far far away. so long long ago. hmmms.

this is soooo accurate! =D

2007-02-19T12:36:00.000+08:00

At first glance, people think you are quiet type of person. Actually you are
cheerful, but conditionally. You will show your joyful character only in good
mood. One the other hand, when you are moody, no one would dare to be around.
Because of your emotion fluctuation and frank character, some find you hard to
be around. You hardly show your feeling towards opposite sex no matter how much you like him/her. Your partner also has similar character so your Love affairs often take quite a while
to flourish. Time tells it all. Your sincerity makes you very attractive.

the krebs cycle

2007-02-19T12:16:00.000+08:00

The Krebs Cycle

melody and lyrics by Lynda Jones; adapted by Do Peterson and Greg Crowther
Greg: geek vocals, keyboard

Lori: lead vocals

Do: bass, hyper-dramatic vocals, keyboard, acoustic and electric guitar, drum programming

Kirk L. Van Scoyoc: banjo

Acetyl CoA combines with oxaloacetic acid

To create a citric acid.

That's how it begins.

Then a water removed and added makes it isocitric acid,

Which, in turn, oxidized and loses CO2.

Then alpha-ketoglutaric is oxidized again,

Losing carbon dioxide with an NADH spin.

Then through a phosphorylation

Succinyl CoA congeals a GDP to GTP to toss back CoASH.

CHORUS:

Acetyl CoA, citric acid, iso-,

Alpha-ketoglutaric, succinyl CoA,

Succeeded by succinic, fumaric and malic,

Then oxaloacetic starts the cycle again.

Soon we see succinic acid forming a fumaric acid

As it forms an FADH2 along the way.

Water washed upon fumaric makes it into acid malic.

Now there's only one step left, so let's be on our way.

With one more oxidation, resisting degradation,

A final NADH is made and brings us to the end.

Oxaloacetic acid, first and last, a simple acid

Then accepts an acetyl CoA and starts again.

CHORUS

oh my gosh i can't believe people will actually make a song out of the krebs cycle. hahaha reminds me of the bad old days of bio in hc. where we are taughted the krebs cycle in respiration and everything. *shudders* and there are more bio-related songs at http://www.science-groove.org Go listen to some of them when you are feeling really extremely bored or u need some bio revision. hahahs

happy chinese new year! (:

2007-02-18T23:15:00.000+08:00

Happy chinese new year everyone!!! :D Hope everyone get loads n loads of angbaos n may the attached ones remain attached happily and the single ones get loads n loads of peach flowers! (:

had extreme makeover of my room yesterday. hahaha. basically had to tidy everything up and transform it from a pig sty to a habitat suitable for human sleeping. hahahah. and i changed my bedsheets! to super nice n bimbo n cute PPG bedsheets! hahaha. don't worry it's not bright pink or something. it's baby blue and really looks quite cute, though probably a little unsuitable for my age. hahas. will post a pic of it here when my bluetooth works. i suspect somehow bluetooth can't seem to work properly when i'm online ): hahas.

made dumplings in the morning with momo n lao ba. Ate steamboat in the afternoon. Went east coast park in the evening. when we reached ecp we were super stunned. there were LOTS of people there, and there were LOTS of tents everywhere?! the whole place was super lively! there were people playing sports, people soaking themselves in the rather dirty sea water, people bbq-ing, people just sitting around relaxing, and people who are just walking around maybe for fun! hahas. we couldn't even find a spot to sit down until we walked to somewhere near the end of the beach. ahahs. then went parkway parade. which was such a big contrast. there were barely people around, most of the shops are closed. haha in the end we just decided to go giant shopping to pass some time. hahahs. which explains why we are back home quite early today (:

oh and i made slight changes to the template. was surfing through blogskins and couldn't find any designs which i like. bleahs. when i'm free then i go make one myself. meanwhile shall just stick to this one. hahahs.

still considering whether to change this blog to private such that only a few people can read it, like my diary-x last time. then i can blog more freely. hahas (:

new year's eve!

2007-02-17T16:40:00.000+08:00

yays! had reunion breakfast with wt and her bro at cafe cartel!! hohoho the food was really not bad though i found the waiting time a little bitz long. hahas.

our drinks! wenting ordered pink grapefruit juice (in order to be bimbotic), me ordered orange juice n her bro order hot choc. haha dun judge a drink by its exterior k, the pink grapefruit juice is bitter lor :p

as i mentioned earlier, the waiting time was a lil long. unfortunately, it was only long for me. haha wt n her bro got their food first so i just kind of spent my time thinking of nonsensical things. such as, this pic is actually to prove that orange slices doesn't look as nice as lemon slices as deco for a drink. wahaha. errr i'm sure normal pple think tt all the time too. =D

apparently wt was feeling bored too. look at what she has done to her pancake -_-''' if you think she'll eat it up after she's finished with playing with her food, you are super wrong can? she just put the fruits back into their bowl and refuse to eat them coz "they have touched her pancake" and maybe became warm or unfresh or sth. wahaha. oh and one more thing, the cherry. it was originally lying innocently in a pile of whipped cream. somebody (i won't say who. haha) just put it in her mouth n spit it out again so tt the whipped cream is removed from the cherry's skin so tt the cherry can look red for the nose. OMG. -__-''" hahaha

when we're done eating, we decided to create some "art" out of what is left. hahahs

so cute iseneh? wahahah. i wonder how would the cafe cartel pple feel when they are clearing away the plates from our table. hahaha

anyway i'm cleaning up my room now. sort of. obviously i'm blogging coz i need an excuse to slack. hahaha. okay lar back to work! =D happy early new year pple!!! hahaha

stats day!

2007-02-16T22:52:00.000+08:00

hohoho! today is stats day! me actually went down to sch at 8 plus in the morning to study stats! everyone pls say woahhhh with me. 1,2,3. woahhhh. hahahah. coz slept the moment i got home yesterday. so today had to mug stats. not bad it was quite useful! and i believe in karma k! Haha coz helped to ans some of my frens' qns. and in the end some came out! (: so it's good to help pple! yays! hohoho

after stats went carrefour shopping with my momo n bro. hohoho bought quite a lot of food n stuff so took a taxi back. the taxi uncle was quite nice but he keep imitating a china accent which was kind of irritating. but apparently he seems to enjoy it. and it was quite funny coz he was mainly self-entertaining himself also. wahahah.

oh anyway saw a giant prawn at carrefour today!

look it's really big lor! hahahah

okay this is proof tt it's big k. the head is like as long as my finger? hahaha. and dun bother asking me why i'm snooping around carrefour taking photos of mutant prawns k. errr i'm sure all normal pple do tt all the time. ha!

happy v day (:

2007-02-15T00:19:00.000+08:00

yays! great day today! hahaha spent the night out with yx n cheryl @ kbox! (: So fun lors! I always never fail to enjoy our outings. hahahs.

gave out tiny cute boxes of tissue paper that dun look like tissue paper boxes this year. hahaha it was more suitable for girls lar but i din care that much and just gave the same thing to the guys also. errr they don't seem to mind? haha not tt they got much of a choice though. hahas.

i always liked v day coz it feels like xmas. haha coz frens will give u stuff n u will give frens stuff. so sweet right? hohoho. this is wad i received so far this year:

not bad lar! i got chocs!! hahaha but unfortunately i can't eat them. so shall just take a photo of everything for momento before i pass all the chocs to my bro :)

yesterday...

2007-02-12T10:19:00.000+08:00

...all my troubles seem so far away~~~

LAME! -.-'''

okay i just self-amused for about 0.3453462 of a second. Hahas. Obviously this blog entry is dedicated to what happened yesterday! hOhOhO! erms a bit high. haha.

okay lar actually yesterday nothing much happened also. went smu early in the morning with cheryl. haha i hope she didn't get lost in there -.-''' met mervyn huiwen seth for a few seconds. dumped books in a locker. (omg my life is so boring tt i'm actually blogging abt this kind of thing!!! o_O)

yada yada. fine. i shall skip the boring parts. haha.

anyway many hours later i met up with yaqi wt dino linda n yanling. went k-ing for a while. they kept singing super old songs that bring back a lot of memories :( haha and somehow made me feel so old coz the songs are like so long ago but i heard of them before! T_T And i felt so super sad due to a mix of reasons. i feel really sad that yaqi is leaving. i dunno why also. hahas. and somehow the incident tt hazel n ber kept replaying inside my head when i was with them. i still dun understand how such a thing could have happened. and yar, i'm disappointed. hrmph. and i felt really distant. like everyone has moved on with their new lives, to the extent that we just aren't tt close anymore. okay lar i think i'm just thinking too much due to everything tt's happening around me. hahas.

on a sidenote, i feel extremely like a substitute. or even a spare tyre. i dunno. this just keeps bugging me for the entire past week and i just want to get it off my chest. maybe it's my fault also. maybe i looked too free or something. how do you draw the line between a good fren and a good substitute for someone also? haha. hard right. and i think i'm just getting my retribution for giving someone else the same type of feeling. bleahs. i need to gain more good karma.

hrmph~!

okay anyway it's a brand new week again! a brand new start (:

randomness again.

2007-02-10T22:38:00.000+08:00

woahh gave beng a lecture on wad kind of person i am. haha coz apparently i was asking him what type of person he think i am and i realised tt i'm quite right after all. i give pple wrong impressions =P so for the first time in my life i actually was so honest to someone that i'm not that close to about myself. haha but beng is someone i can trust lar so not tt bad.

it's a great feeling being able to slack the whole day off without doing much things (: Yays.

now that many many people around me seems bothered with their own problems i find it hard to find someone just to crap with. or mug with. or just go shopping or movies with. haha i know i sound like some immature attention-demanding person but yar it's just how i feel these days.

hhmmm!!!

2007-02-09T22:56:00.000+08:00

today's a not-bad day (:

but felt kind of alone though i wasn't left alone at all today. hmmms. haha. only when seth mention did i realise tt i was with a whole grp of guys. was the only girl with them in the gsr in the library to do work. at that moment suddenly felt a little weird. hahas. though i'm kind of used to it but it didn't really affect me most of the time. lost my wallet today and found it back. kind of contributed to my blurred-diao mode. hahas. then ended up feeling a lil bit lonely today coz i din feel like talking too much during all the meals also. and i din feel like going home either. felt sleepy also. so i basically stoned my day away. but stoning felt good. hahas. maybe i shld stone more often. not even sure wad i'm typing makes sense not coz in a very tired state now. yar i'm worse than drunk when i'm tired i think. haha. so yar shall just end this entry here. have to fetch bro to british council tmr morning like usual so i better sleep earlier! (:

candy flossy night (:

2007-02-09T08:20:00.000+08:00

Dinner with ber yesterday! (: Hohoho it was super fun lar! =D We went new york new york and met a super enthu waiter there. Coz our table is short of a set of cutlery. Haha then he went to take another set and then told us with a straight face that "I'm sorry to inform you Ma'am, that our restaurant has run out of ice water." I was blurred coz i saw two large jugs of ice water at their counter. Harhar. In the end I just replied "Oh it's okay then." And he started laughing. Haha and started saying how can a restaurant ever run out of ice water. Errrrr =.= Hahaha. And then he was asking us to give him a few seconds to pour water for us. In the end he took more than just "a few seconds" and he just went "Oh no! I took about a minute! Oh dear!" =.=''' hahaha. so lame lar! Then the ultimate was during the candy floss. Me n ber went to take candy floss. Or rather, I went to pay n berber went to take first. He let ber take the candy floss herself! Hahaha. And she can make a big big one. In the end ber made a relatively quite big but not very big one. Then he made a BIG one for me. Berber saw that i got a BIG one so she wants a BIG one too. So u know wad he did? He just took the one that berber made and gave it to some other customer! hahaha. And then he made a BIG one for berber! Ahaha :D Win liaos right. hahaha.

Oh here's a super ugly photo of me biting into the green apple flavoured candy floss. =.=

Then we went shopping @ marina square. Met another super enthu salesman at action city. He keep rambling about a lot of stuff while we searched for our super cute tissue boxes. Haha me n ber were like wondering how come everyone is a lil weird around us. Wahaha. But it was a great night out! Yays (:

trojan horse

2007-02-08T10:47:00.000+08:00

ARGH. i got this virus from some thumbdrive i inserted into my comp -.- now it keeps showing me that my system time is wrong. why? coz this stupid virus alters your system time to 1 April 1980. Woah. April fools' day somemore T_T

BOOs. I'm trying to fight a battle against this lame horsey! Trying to find more info on it but argh, the webpages on this sxs2.exe thingy is all in pure chinese! omg. *faints*

HIGH!! =D

2007-02-05T00:17:00.000+08:00

YAY!!! Daren won!!!! OMG!! hahahah just got back from watching proj superstar 2 grand finals! for the first time i got the experience of being a real fan!! me n yx were given the blue shirts which represented daren and we sat with the fans at the premium seats! And we were also given those blue balloon things that we could use to make noise and stuff when we cheer! And we were given whistles to blow! Super cool and fun can?? Hahaha I feel like I've got a life lors!!! :p

Kind of sad that Diya lost though. Coz afterall she's my senior and i really do support her too. But today's performance i really felt that Daren's one was better overall. Oh wells, let's hope that they both get singing contracts! (:

soOOoo HAPPY!!!! (: lalala!

yawns.

2007-02-04T14:24:00.000+08:00

went mervyn's place for the drinking experiment as a control. woahhh. alcohol really has quite a big impact on how a person will behave man. hurhurhur. haha but the entire thing was so fun! (: think it was more like a party than some experiment lors! the only bad thing about it was probably my deprivation of sleep. slept at 6am this morning only to wake up at 8am to go home. woahh. totally blurred when i was going home! had difficulties telling the uncle where i stayed. haha poor uncle. hahaha. and slept a few more hours after i got back. still feels super sleepy but i guess i really can't sleep liao. otherwise my whole day would be gone already. hehe.

vaguely remembers wad happened last night. loads of games! and fun! especially from observing how people change after they drink slightly too much alcohol. woahh it's like a total new experience for me! coz i've never ever seen anyone drunk before, not even slightly drunk lar! hahas.

--

realised that i gave some pple the wrong impression liaos. HAI. i'm blur but not that blur lar. i do act blur sometimes, though obviously not most of the time lar. but eh i think i shld be able to survive if i'm dumped into some unknown jungle lehs! ): haiyos. i'm just ignorant about a lot of general knowledge stuff i guess. hehe. why am i seen as being so vulnerable?? aiyos! ): think i too dependent on them when i'm around them liaos. i'm too used to being with them most of the time, having someone to pei me do this do that. but i guess i shld really be mindful of about certain stuff liaos. budden again, probably i feel so safe with them around, i trust them alot and ended up just keep showing them the weaker side of me simply because i don't need to be strong? hmms. 2 sides of the same person. woah. hahas. but i guess everyone has their "split personalities" bahs, haha just whether they show both/only one of the sides to the people around them? doesn't mean that they are being hypocritical or anything bah. After all, deep down it's still the same person. it just probably depends on the circumstances. hmms. i can be strong but i don't like to be. hehs.

2007-01-30T20:25:00.000+08:00

i'll leave it to fate to decide it now.

dilemma

2007-01-30T00:12:00.000+08:00

I'm really really glad that I got the 2 free tickets to Project Superstar Grand Finals. Felt really very happy when i received the email confirmation because it would be the first time I'm going to be the audience of a real "live" concert, and what's more, there's going to be Diya and Daren and all the superstars performing (: It sounds great even thinking about it (:

BUT. there's always a but to good things i guess. haha to think for a while i was deluded that i would be that lucky, finally winning a lucky draw (: It happens to clash with the farewell dinner of one of my closest secondary sch friend. HAI. i think i won't be able to forgive myself if I didn't go, because as I've said, it's one of my closest friend. But yet I feel so sad giving up the tickets also, because it is so damn hard to get these tickets. Tried asking my seniors for it and it took them so long but eventually giving a more-or-less negative answer. And to make it worse, the dinner was supposedly on sat but eventually it got changed to sun. So I'm kind of forced to make a choice. Which I can safely say, I would choose to go for the dinner. Which is kind of weird. Haha. Because if I didn't get the concert tix, I might not go for the dinner, because I really really hate farewell sendoffs. I just cannot stand the thought of sending anyone away and it makes me super depressed after that. Hurhur. Probably doesn't happen to everyone so I don't really expect anyone to know what I'm talking about. But seriously, even hearing of normal friends going overseas makes me sad, because I somehow feel that I won't be able to see them anymore in the future. SIGH.

In fact, I always have this belief that if I don't go and send someone off, I might still be able to keep in contact with the person. It's as though once you've said goodbye, there's not really much of a chance to see each other again.

So tomorrow I'll make a decision. No matter what I'll be collecting the tickets. Only diff is whether I would be keeping them at home as momento or using them to enter the indoor stadium.

--

If only there was a solution to the whole problem.

(:

2007-01-26T22:38:00.000+08:00

i really miss fengjiao nuah nuah linda and wenting lar! so long never gone out together already! oh man i really really really miss all of you! ): and it's really kind of sad that nuah nuah is leaving for australia soon but somehow after today's dinner it's even more confirmed that we won't forget each other no matter wad happens (:

would have wanted to listened more to linda but my bus came and so i had to go. haven't managed to finish listening to what she was saying ):

and i want to talk more to nuah nuah also! coz i really miss her gentle n super pure n nice character! (: and so long never niao her about her husband liaos. and also niao her about her poor horse hooves that have no horse shoes coz she too poor liaos. hahas

and fengjiao also!! woah i din know u still reading my blog lor! u still care for me! =P haha k lar next time servant treat u to something okay? servant is rich now k! =P haha so u better give me face and go out together soon k! (:

and not forgetting my dear patrick! woah i never realise i quite long nv see u liaos though we always talk on msn hor? haha chams this is the effect of technology. (wow i'm so pro in twc now =P) haha but yar lors it's always good to talk to u and disturb u! muahaha. thanks so much for being there in my life!! (:

(:

2007-01-25T23:11:00.000+08:00

it's always good to stay @ home or just go somewhere other than sch (: had a good slacking day today and yet managed to finish wad i want to finish (: hohohos.

did i mention that i ask a stupid question in twc yesterday? I asked the prof whether having many sex partners would lead to the increase in demand for birth control pills. woah wad was i thinking arh? hahahas.

Anyway i made a blunder in MA also. Haha prof was asking whether something was a good thing. And i was in a total zzzz state so i said it was a good thing. And she was asking for the person who said tt it was a good thing to explain why it's a good thing. aka me lar. hahaha apparently i said it without thinking through why so i kind of just shrunk back into my seats pretending not to be the one who answered her qn. hahas. ended up someone else in front of me said tt he was the one (???) who answered that it's a good thing and gave some brilliant explanation as to why it was a good thing. erps. hahaha.

Oh and another update is that I finally (not that I want to) have the experience of taking a cab without having enough cash in the first place to take it. dun try it lor. it's not fun k. haha. i was imagining myself washing the cab as a way to pay back the money or sth -__-'''' luckily everything was okay in the end. phew! (: errr i'm still quite lucky lar hor? at least i made it to the classroom, instead of some ulu wash car place where i'll be dumping soapwater on the car or sth. hahahs.

had a nightmare last night and couldn't slp the night before ): Sob. So super tired now ): Booos. I feel like a pig complaining, since I've been sleeping about 7 hours per day nowadays. Hehe.

rahhhhhs.

2007-01-24T21:43:00.000+08:00

i felt like a super BIG 8458475295783 Watt lightbulb yesterday. shan't elaborate on details.

school was okay today. twc was quite fun. hahas i'm probably the only one who says tt but doesn't matter. wahaha. ate lunch with wuhui leon seth regina irene seth. then went library to do AS with wuhui leon seth. haha. no life :(

got presentation coming up :( haf to prepare for it by tmr. and i got stats hw to do also. and loads of MA n TWC readings to do. this weekend i'm gg to piah already. rahs.

and i dun understand how come i suddenly can't seem to find anyone tt is free around me. ha. or rather i can't find anyone who's as free as me. i feel super bo liao, as though i'm like disturbing everyone. everyone seems to have their own stuff to do. wad am i doing? -.-

it's just not tt great a week yar? argh.

lil updates

2007-01-22T08:41:00.000+08:00

hahaha happy 20th birthday to auntie cheryl wors!!! :) Older by one more year liaos! muahaha :p

been reading up on the bgs case about pizza delivery men. haha i didn't know it's so dangerous to deliver pizza in the US. 5th most dangerous job leh! O_O hurhurhur. they made it sound like people could kill each other for issues over pizzas. -.-'''

--

Ate the $19.50 chicken rice at meritus mandarin on Sat with momo n bro. Haha it was not as great as it claims to be, neither was it as good as i thought it would be. (u know, judging from the price) Not that it wasn't nice, but just not that delicious yar? haha. well, if not for the 50 bucks voucher we had, we won't have gone there in our entire lives or something. $19.50 for a plate of chicken rice! -.-''' i could have eaten 8 plates of chicken rice at the hawker centre near my house. hahas. momo was saying that we should have spent the voucher on the international buffet in the hotel which was originally 40+ bucks per person. which i agree! :( haha but too late now to do anything about it also :p anyway the entire 2 adult sets and 1 kid's set of chicken rice only cost us $1.15 in the end:) which of course, is worth it:) muahaha

--

sch is getting SIAN!! bleahs i'm not studying at all lor! tsk tsk. doing hw last min again. tsk tsk. haha but wells, i'm supposed to slack more this sem. afterall, i need to build up my immune system! :D

SAF: Standard Argument Form

2007-01-14T21:41:00.000+08:00

P1. Telling all lame jokes requires some intelligence.

P2. Wanyi tells lame jokes.

C.> Wanyi has some intelligence. (muahahah)

P3. Understanding lame jokes requires less intelligence.

P4. Most of Wanyi's lame jokes aren't being understood.

C.> Wanyi has more intelligence than her lame jokes' audience. (muahahahah)

--

Just lame-ing around after reading a few pages of my Analytical Skills textbook. Haha okay back to my darling book! (:

i need a clown too.

2007-01-13T21:15:00.000+08:00

okay. had bgs and as today. forgot to bring my hp to sch today. supposed to meet mervyn for lunch but had no means of contacting him. grr. getting flu soon, could feel it coming. got a brain freeze during bgs while i was trying to explain some super simple concept. but ah wells wadever. headed for ps w my bgs grp pple to eat lunch and then go spotlight so tt yx(not usin..haha) could buy the materials to make a pillow. ended up being late for as. noticed something that i would rather not notice. maybe i'm getting oversensitive. maybe. unfortunately it's rarely the case though. haiz.

i can't stand superficial people. and people who befriend others because of "reasons". and hypocrites. and the list goes on. yar i know i seem superiorly blurred. and i know i'm blur. but honestly being blur doesn't mean i'm a retard or sth. i think the people who knows me well would know better than to show that side of them to me. but then again, such people won't get to know me well at all.

and loads of things are happening around me. i need more peace as compared to listening to things that i dun want to listen to. or saying things that i dun want to say. just 3 days in school made me zonk out. i can't always be the one cheering others up though of coz i'm happy to. hahahs.

rambles~!

2007-01-10T21:13:00.000+08:00

twc was okay today i guess. not much feelings. haha other than the fact tt my fren deliberately sat in front of me to "disturb" me. i found it quite funny coz he happen to wear bright yellow and i kept thinking that the only way he could have disturbed me is by looking like a banana. (that's why i dun dare to disclose his name here..hahaha)bleahs evil thought. haha he's quite a nice n funny person:) oh then knew one more person from class. by emailing him to join our grp initially. stupid me. emailed him without knowing how he looks like. so apparently when he called my name i was like "huh? do i know you?", trying to place him in my memory of jc or sec or even pri sch mate or sth. -__-''' felt a lil baichi. hahas. and then i stepped on someone(i dunno his name)'s breadtalk bag which apparently have this plastic box inside. the plastic box went "piak" and for a moment i was petrified. thought i stepped on his breakfast/lunch-to-be. but apparently tt someone laughed n said there was no bread in tt bag. -___-''' felt even more baichi.

lunch met leon mervyn zhongyi seth irene regina & jeremy. aka who i ate lunch with last week. haha only ate a char siew bao + watermelon for lunch coz i ate a big chicken bao during break which made me quite full. me n seth kept asking each other lame questions. hahaha quite funny. then went frujch n played xbox DOA with leon. yay i won quite a few rounds! bwahaha! :D

then went for a short ltb meeting. bleahs. can't believe we are still going to do ltb when our module has ended last yr. dun mind meeting up with them though, i like spending time with my grp mates:)

then went back to frujch to slop around till my MA class. haha watched a bit of x-men! (:

MA class was kind of boring like usual coz i have no idea wad she's talking about. haha apparently nothing i learnt in FA helped. doesn't matter lar, i'll go read the textbook someday. hahas. kept myself occupied by attempting to pay attention in class + play popcap games + chat on msn. hahahas. but the good thing was that we were released super early. at 6.15!! ^_^ yay i'm happy! hahas

got a lift home again! so i got to watch my 7pm show which i haven't watched for a long time:) lalala!:)

randomness

2007-01-09T22:13:00.000+08:00

felt kind of lonely today despite seeing so many familiar faces in my bgs and as classes. i'm weird! ): and lunch today was weird. grrr.

oh went out with yx today though (: yays!! hohoho we ate pepper lunch for dinner. errrrr. shld eat pepper lunch for lunch iseneh? HOHOHO. lame. hahahah.

anyway i like my profs!!! love all of them to bits and pieces. erps. hahahah but seriously i'm finding all of them interesting. except for MA. MA is boring ): hahaha even stats is better than MA. hahas. i'm weird! i like school. erps!

--

must learn to see the goodness in everything. hahaha and don't think too much:)

new laptop!! (:

2007-01-06T21:06:00.000+08:00

and it's PINK!!! hohoho colours brighten up my day! (: and no matter wad you say, i think it's chio (: yay love it!! and it has loads of software pre-installed! photoshop, premiere, mastering studio blah blah...woohoo!!!

grr.

2007-01-06T14:12:00.000+08:00

at times like this i hate project work. and i wish i knew more people.

wish me luck ):

bliss..

2007-01-06T00:59:00.000+08:00

went for a chinese performance just now. haha it was super funny so it kind of cheered me up:)

went sch early today to meet leon n buhui for lunch:) met xuehui! :) then went for stats b. hurhurhur. dun misunderstand me, the prof is v v v nice, though a bit dry, but yup i like him. just tt it feels weird sitting in a class which is so small, only 20+ pple i think, for once. and it happens tt i know like half the class. and of all mods, it's the mod tt needs no grp proj :(

went home super early today. hahas. so nan2 de2 i actually went home from school while the sun is still up there in the sky. watched 2 episodes of goong before going for the performance.

ignoring all the complications. haha. afterall, ignorance is bliss (:

--

只做朋友不好吗？

1st day of school (:

2007-01-03T21:05:00.000+08:00

yays! 1st day of sch went well! hahahs. my twc prof looks nice :) started the day off by watching a bloody and gory film where cavemen of 2 different tribes(one more hairy, the other one *duh* less hairy) from 100,000 years ago fought each other with spears. the second film was a documentary about eskimos building igloos which was much nicer and the eskimos looked so cute!! they even have a large piece of ice for their igloo's window! hahas. 3rd one was something about going into space, looking at the earth and moon. bleahs. tt kind of technology bores me. hahah i think i prefer the older days or something. yeah man RETRO rawks!! hahahah

went for lunch with leon, mervyn + 4 other friends of theirs, ate jap food! hohoho. then went back to school to sleep in frujch(i honestly have no idea how to spell it). went for MA hoping to see any soul that i know.

tada! haha saw the clique of my ltb ta. hahaha. so qiao. they were in my FA class and now it's MA. haha. anyway did see about erms 2 pple that I know. bleahs. hahah but not bad lar at least got someone i know sitting beside me can liaos. hahah i happy enough oredi.

went home in a sports car today!! hohoho. so zai lar, one of my classmates actually drives a sports car to school! so shun bian gave me a lift lor coz apparently he stays in hougang also. woah felt like some country pumpkin lor. was woah-ing at everything. hahaha

came back home to watch superstar!! yay diya is top again!! :)

--

yesterday spent a whole afternoon playing mahjong. woah i got luck wor!! won the game eventually! hohoho :p eric only managed to win ONCE after so many rounds. hahaha even though he kept telling us that luck is on his side. super lame lar! hahah it was good to see him after so long lar, coz very long nv talk to him and listen to his lameness liao. haha. yx n jy went too. well, as i've say, hatchet is buried, so didn't feel any hostility or unhappiness during the outing at all:) night was quite terrible though. almost didn't sleep the entire night coz think i ate something wrong, causing my heart to beat too fast again. tsk tsk i really must watch my food man. haha.

--

glad that despite me being late for class and everything, today went well:) yay blessed me! :)

happy new year wor!! (:

2007-01-02T00:20:00.000+08:00

may everyone be happy n healthy always!! ahahah and may those singles out there get more peach flowers! wahahah. oh and hope everyone have a good good good year ahead! bless u wors! hahaha :D

it's 2007 wor!! (though i think everyone knows that oredi) a brand new start and beginning wor! *sniffs fresh air of 2007* hohoho:)

was listening to a particular song today. reminded me of huangcheng. as though it was not too long ago since i last step into vt and checking out the lights and costumes and stuff. wow. memory is still fresh in my mind. anyway i realise my memories are buried in the form of songs. haha wadever i'm listening to for a particular period of time, it'll remind me of wad happened then. coz i always change cd or add songs to my ipod when some phase of my life is over. i wonder how many others out there are like me. anyway i'm digressing. hahah. huangcheng. 2 years of my life in hc spent on it. i've long passed the times where i used to ask myself wad i gained/lost from it. looking back now, i only have fond memories of it, the unhappy ones are buried somewhere deep. i guess this is what people mean by burying the hatchet yar? u remember the good and leave out the bad. it certainly took me quite long to be able to have the courage to face up to everything and then leave them behind me. hoho but i did it wor! :)

the next step would be to return to the theatre someday. i miss drama. i miss the kind of hectic life where everyone gives their all to make a performance perfect. i think a quiet life doesn't suit me. for long at least. i do appreciate breaks but there's just an unspoken bond between me and theatre. hahah probably due to the fact tt i've been involved in drama for 6 years already. not used to life without it. probably won't want to get used to life without it. haha, with or without the theatre, i think drama has became part of my life liaos :) think i suddenly start to sound like peter sau. erps. *shudders*

anyway gg to slp liao pple! HAPPY NEW YEAR AGAIN!! may all ur new year resolutions (if u even bothered to make one) come true! :)

i passed...

2006-12-29T18:41:00.000+08:00

MY DRIVING!!!! YAY!! can't believe my luck man. hahah i got the same examiner that failed me the second time n he recognized me. hahah at first he bluffed me say i failed lor. tsk tsk tsk. scare me half to death. aft tt he told me to be careful n can go watch video le. so so so happy! :) hahaha i love him!! hahahah

people who know me would know how much i dread driving lessons n driving test. hohoho! i can't believe everything is over :)

oh and today's such a sunny nice day! dad coming back later from china. double happiness:) and my driving instructor called me to congratulate me. triple happiness:) my momo n bro were there with me today too! 4 times happiness! :) all in all, it's a happy day!! [beams]

la la la la la! :)

serenity

2006-12-28T21:11:00.000+08:00

been busy learning driving these days. hohoho! tmr is my driving test again! -shudders-

oh my oh my.. i really do hope i pass. driving lessons are expensive man. i feel darn bad for spending so much on it. tsk tsk. wanyi must jiayou! haha

on a lighter note, these few rainy days gave me peace and serenity. been great just slopping around at home and spending time tuitioning my bro. :)

watched night at the museum today!! super lame show! great show though :) do go watch it if u r as free as me. hohoho.

一切要用一颗平常心去对待。现在心里好平静。我这颗平常心好不容易才被我给找了回来。虽然之前用了不少时间去寻找很多自己不需要的东西，但是至少现在终于发现自己需要什么，就已经心满意足了。能够知足常乐，真的，就足够了。:)

xmas is over (:

2006-12-27T19:33:00.000+08:00

xmas this year is a lil plain. probably coz i'ven't been out much these few days. hahah been at home slacking around, watching korean drama. life's been good so far. eating very healthily too! :)

missed the times spent in china though. it's a great feeling being back there, with the negative 10+ degrees temperature. though i can't stand the amount of smoke generated by the smokers, but it's been great! the air smells fresh coz the cold probably killed all the bacteria flying about in the air anyway ;)

been enjoying theses days where i spend more time with myself, as well as my family members. once school starts it's going to be 3 packed months again, especially with 6 modules coming my way. hahahs.

gotta treasure my remaining holiday times! hahah (:

(:

2006-12-24T18:35:00.000+08:00

today's driving was great!!! muahahahah :p i changed instructor again. this time, finally, it's not some horrible rough-speaking guy or some ah pek! hohoho! this time it's actually a 20+ yr old guy who was just transferred to kovan! :) yays!! hehehe.

hmms. china trip. it was GREAT! dyed my hair there n made slight changes to my hairstyle (: took studio shots too! quite fun! wahahah. got the pics in my comp but shan't post them here. afterall, 长得丑不是我的错，但是出来吓人就是我的错了。hahahah. learnt a lot from the trip this time, made me know myself better, and let me realise wad i really want:) all in all, it's a really meaningful trip! not to mention the chance to mix n play around with my darling cousins there who treat me like siblings:) and i love my gigantic family members who are all still so close to us:) missed them a lot after i got back to singapore.

loads of funny n unexpected events happened along the way (like always-__-''') but i'm really too lazy to blog it here. hahaha.

got back 3/4 of the results le. not too bad :) but nx year i'm not going to piah so hard le. no point lar, my health n morale more impt. hahahah. my new year resolution would be to sleep before midnight everyday:)

looking forward to 2008! hahaha for tt's the year my cousin is coming over to join me at smu! :)

oops!

2006-12-24T11:02:00.000+08:00

i realised i haven't blogged for ages. hahaha. especially since the exams if i'm not wrong. erm...ha! i've gone to china for 2 weeks mah, so nv blogged. hurhurhur. okay lar not v gd excuse. got a lot of things to blog abt so v lazy to type everything out. bleahs. nvm i'll blog when i get back from my horrendous driving lesson later :)